Part 15 (1/2)

There you go, said Rafel, stroking the ponys warm brown neck as it crunched and s...o...b..red, white apple-foam dripping. You did good today, running faster than Gooses nag. Youre the best pony in the kingdom.

Stag snorted, agreeing. Rafel rested his forehead against Stags cheek, fingers reaching to scratch behind the ponys ears, where it sometimes itched. He heard the funny flap-flap-slap of Stags droopy lips, the sound the pony made when his fingers found the right spot.

Im frighted, Stag, he whispered. Da and Mama say what I felt in the riverpond was Lur rolling over in its sleep, thats all, but that aint true. I know it aint true. And I reckon Das gonna try and stop whats really wrong. But what if he cant, Stag? Its bad. Its really bad. What if Dawhat if he He couldnt say the words out loud. He felt dizzy to think them, even.

He smeared his sleeve across his face, angry at himself for being frighted Da might die. Angry at his father for lying. For still treating him like a sprat.

I aint Deenie. Im old enough to know.

Stag nudged his arm, asking for more apple.

Sorry, he said. I only brought one. I only ever bring one. Reckon you ought to know that by now, you ole trout.

Stag snorted again, nose wrinkled, and stuck out his long tongue. Because it was their game, and it wasnt Stags fault he was frighted, Rafel grabbed the ponys tongue and tugged it, but only a few times. He wasnt in the mood for playing.

Night, Stag, he said, and patted him goodbye. See you in the morning.

He walked back to the Tower, feeling the cloudy night stretching dark and quiet around him. Even the nightbirds singing was soft, as though they couldnt not sing but were afraid of waking something. Bright light burned in Da and Mamas parlour window. It was far too early for them to be asleep. Halfway up the Towers wide stone steps he slowed, then stopped. He was meant to go straight to bed now, that was the way it worked. One apple for Stag then upstairs to sleep. Except How am I sposed to sleep when they wont tell me the truth? They should tell me the truth, after what I felt today.

But there was no point arguing on it, even though he surely wanted to. Hed already tried once. Made Da all fearsome, so Mama had to soothe him down. She was good at that. She got a lot of practise. But seeing Da fearsome made him glad he hadnt told his parents everything. Hed told them what hed felt at the riverpond with Goose, but he left out the part about calling the silver carp. It wasnt Doranen magic, but even so theyd be fratched. Last thing he needed was for Da to be fratched. When Da was fratched he noticed things.

And if he figures out what else Ive been doing when hes already riled Feeling guilty and scared, and twice as p.r.i.c.kly because of it, he stamped into the Tower and up the winding staircase to the blue floor, which was all his. Maybe hed feel better for reading Tollins adventures again. They were fearsome toohe and Goose had near wet themselves, reading that parchmentbut in a funny way it was a good kind of fright. A ghost story fright. Theyd played explorers the whole afternoon after reading it, and pretended to die dozens of lingering, gruesome deaths. But as he rode home hed remembered the riverpond and his happiness had fizzled. Cheering himself up with Tollins parchment was sure to help. Except Deenie was perched on the middle of his bed, waiting for him.

What do you want? he said, slamming the chamber door behind him, his heart slamming just as hard. If shed been snooping if shed found the hidden parchment This is my room. You aint allowed in here.

Knees pulled up to her chest, arms wrapped around them, her long nightdress glowing pinkly in the bedside lamps glimfire, Deenie looked at him. Her eyes filled with tears.

Snivel, snivel, snivel, he added, feeling savage. Youre such a girl, Deenie. Go back to bed.

She sniffed, not budging. What happened today, Rafe?

That made him blink. Nowt. Why? What dyou mean?

I felt something, she said, hugging her knees even harder. I feltI felt you.

You did not, he retorted. Youre just a sprat, Deenie. You cant feel nowt.

Yes, I can, she said, nodding hard. You did a big magic, Rafe. And then you got all scared and upside-down when the earth went funny. I felt it.

No, you didnt! His mouth was dry, his belly churning. And if you tell Da and Mama you did, IllIllI dont do big magic!

Her chin was all wobbly. Yes, you do. Today you made the fish jump. And other times you crack stones and you dance leaves and you do silly things with your bathwater. She was breathing all hiccupy now, her eyes glitter bright. You do trickier things too. Andand this morning you did something really tricky.

She could feel him doing the spells he pinched from Arlin? Shed felt him picking Das Doranen lock? Shocked breathless, he stared at his sister. And then he shoved her hard with both hands so she tumbled backwards onto his pillows.

If you tell Da or Mama any of that IllIll spit on you! he panted, nearly cross-eyed with fright. With magic in it! See if I dont!

Deenie scrambled to the floor, putting the quilt-covered bed between them. I wont tell. Why would I tell? Dont spit on me. Please dont spit on me, Rafe.

Suddenly he felt horrible, like the worst person in Lur. Deenies eyes were so wide. She was a bratty sprat, his little sister, a girl, but she was family. And there she stood staring at him with her wide eyes dribbling tears, because of him. Hed done that. Hed made her afraid.

I wont, he said, hot with sudden shame, and dropped onto his bed. I wont, Deenie. I promise.

Sniffing again, she clambered up beside him. Whyd you go all upside-down, Rafe?

I aint sure, he said, and held out his arm for her to snuggle against him. Its hard to explain. How come you know when I do tricky magic, Deenie? Not even Da knows that.

Safe and soothed beside him she shrugged, a tiny wriggle of her shoulders. I just do, she whispered.

Aye, but how?

Another wriggle. I feel it, she said. In here. She poked a finger into her nightdress-covered chest. Like a tickle.

Hed never heard of such a thing. Pother Kerril had never said anything on it. Neither had Da or Mama. Who knows you feel magic?

No-one, she said. Just you.

Da doesnt know? Or Mama?

She shook her head. No.

You aint even told Charis?

Rafe Why not? You tell her everythin else, he said. Youre always whisperin and gigglin, you two.

She wriggled right out from under his arm. We are not! Anyway, you and Goose are the same. Cept you dont giggle. You snort. Thats boys giggling, Charis says.

Charis, he sneered. Shes a frilly sprat, she is.

She is not! said Deenie. Anyway, Goose is aagoose.

He aint no such thing!

Is too!

Is not!

Istoo!Hehe You hush up, Deenie, he said, fist raised. This is my room, and Goose is my friend. So you dont get to call him names.

Flushed and teary again, Deenie slid off the bed and put her hands on her hips. Youre mean, Rafel. Youre aabossy ole fart!

He rolled his eyes. Im ten, Deenie. I aint b.l.o.o.d.y old.

Oooh! she said, and slapped a hand to her mouth. You said b.l.o.o.d.y, Rafel. You said a swear.

He smirked. So did you. So were even. So there.

Its not the same!