Part 46 (1/2)

”You love him,” Marcello accused. ”I can feel it.”

”As a brother, yes, I love him as my brother, my father, my friend,” Tatiana said. She could feel the jealousy in him and was sorry for it. ”Leandro has my loyalty, but not my heart. He is a necessity. His friends.h.i.+p is something I need. I've felt that it is.

You are something I choose, something I want, but also something I need if I am to survive. I understand if you feel your heart is dead. I don't demand your love, I never have. I only demand your presence with me if it is freely given.”

Marcello said nothing, only listened. His face was cautiously blank, as he hid his emotions from her.

”I know what you took from him. I know about the woman you killed--his woman.”

”He told you that?” Marcello asked.

”He didn't have to. I felt it,” Tatiana said. ”Despite what she was, he loved her. She was his humanity. You killed that in him. I only wish to see him have it back. That is why I wished for us to stay with him. He needs a family. He is so alone. We are all alone. Being alone together makes it not so bad.”

”He doesn't want us,” Marcello spat. ”He has banished us from him.”

”You never once offered to bridge the gap. You never once said you were sorry for killing that woman,” Tatiana said. She stepped up into the carriage. Marcello followed, sitting across from her in the darkness. He hit the ceiling, signaling for the driver to go.

”I don't regret the fact that she died. He knows that. Any words I say would be false,” Marcello answered when they were moving.

”Tell me, then. Why did you do it? Did you not wish him to have her? Please, tell me you were not so cruel as to torture your own flesh and blood for a sick moment of pleasure.”

”I was different. Jiri was a harsh master. He didn't have our regard for human life. I starved myself until I could no longer fight the hunger. I didn't know what I had become or why. The woman was a wh.o.r.e. She'd been sleeping with almost every man in the village for years, from old farmers to young servants. Leandro wouldn't believe anyone but her. He was happy only in ignorance. He wanted to change her to be with him. I felt that he did. He protected her, gave her money, jewels, clothing-- anything she wanted. If she wanted revenge against someone, he would take their life. She was an evil, cruel woman who discovered Leandro's immortal secret and used it. So I went to her to tell her to go away. I was going to pay her off. But she kept offering her neck to me, taunting me. I was so hungry. I bit her. So help me, I bit her and I drank the life from her.”

”You really killed her?” Tatiana asked, breathless. ”The woman he loved?”

”She wasn't worthy of his eternity.” Marcello looked out the carriage window.

”Eternity is a long time to hold a grudge,” Tatiana said. ”Are you sure there isn't more to it?”

Marcello's sadness and regret clouded over them, as he continued, ”Only afterwards did I remember her wanting me to change her. For some reason Leandro had refused up until that point. Now, I think he must have known his blood was too weak to do it.”

”What happened?” Tatiana moved across the carriage seat and gently cupped her hand on Marcello's jaw, drawing his eyes back to her. She kissed him lightly, unable to hold back. Soothingly, she stroked his hair.

”Leandro saw what I had done and tried to save her. He forced me to give her back her blood mixed with mine. She drank it greedily, almost draining me completely and I let her have it. Her body died a horrible, painful death that went on for days.

We sat and watched it like two confused children wondering what we had done wrong. Leandro refused to end her suffering and so we waited. That morning, before dawn, we carried her to the graveyard and stuck her in a coffin. Jiri expected us back in our own beds. Now, I think, he must have known what we had done, but he said nothing to us.”

”And the next night? When you went to get her? She was a vampire?”

”No. She was still there, screaming in agony. She'd ripped gashes into her skin and pulled out all her hair. Leandro tried to feed her, but she wouldn't drink of blood, wouldn't partake of human food. She just kept clawing at her flesh and screaming, crouching on the ground in a corner. After that, Leandro refused to leave her again. I was forced to tell Jiri what had happened.

Jiri told Leandro to put her out of her misery, to kill her. He refused. She stayed like that for about a week. In the end, she didn't change. I was too young to change anyone, the vampiric blood in me too new. He stayed by her side the whole time.

And when it was finally over, she was reduced to ash in his arms.”

Tatiana continued to caress the side of Marcello's face. ”That is why you promised never to change me.”

”Si, bella mia,” Marcello said, reaching to press his hand over hers. ”I have never changed anyone. Leandro has never forgiven me for it. He said that I killed his love for me that night. It has not grown back since and after dead so long a time, I doubt it will ever grow back. We are not the boys we once were. Jiri saw to that.”

Tatiana leaned up and kissed him gently. The year had pa.s.sed for them, sleeping in each others arms, making love. But, neither of them spoke of their hearts. Hers beat his name in a constant rhythm, but she hid it from him. She couldn't bear to have her love unreturned so she kept it quiet. But to sense his pain--so fierce inside him--she only loved him more. The truth of it choked her until she wanted to cry. She pulled her lips back.

”And yet, he released me to you,” she whispered quietly. ”That is something.”