Part 7 (1/2)

'You, Lord? Surely not.'

'On the contrary. What do you think I felt when they tied my wrists above me to the flogging ring in the temple wall?'

'I just did not imagine that you could feel fear.'

'I was a man then, Joseph. With all a man's weaknesses and flaws. That was the whole point. And a man can feel great fear. So when they showed me the scourge, with its knotted thongs set with fragments of iron and lead, and told me what it would do, I cried from fear.'

'I never thought of it that way, Lord. It was never reported.'

'A small mercy. Why are you afraid?'

'I feel there is something going on around me in this fearsome city that I cannot understand.'

'Then I sympathize. The fear of what you can understand is bad enough, but it has its limits. The other fear is worse. What do you want of me?'

'I need your fort.i.tude, your strength.'

'You already have them, Joseph. You inherited them when you took my vows and wore my cloth.'

'Then surely I cannot be worthy of them, Lord, for they escape me now. I fear you chose a poor vessel when you picked the farm-boy from Mullingar.'

'In fact, you chose me. But no matter. Has my vessel cracked and let me down so far?'

'I have sinned, of course.'

'Of course. Who does not? You have l.u.s.ted after Christine de Chagny.'

'She is a beautiful woman, Lord, and I am also a man.'

'I know. I was, once. It can be very hard. You confessed and were forgiven?'

'Yes.'

'Well, thoughts are thoughts. You did nothing more?'

'No, Lord. Just thoughts.'

'Well then, perhaps I may retain confidence in my farm-boy a mite longer. What of your unexplained fears?'

'There is a man in this city, a strange man. The day we arrived I looked up from the quayside and saw a figure on the roof of a warehouse, staring down. He wore a mask. Yesterday we went to Coney Island; Christine, young Pierre, a local reporter and myself. Christine went into a part of the funfair known as the Hall of Mirrors. Last night she asked for confession and told me ...'

'I think you are allowed to tell me, as I am inside your own head. Go on.'

'That she had met him inside. She described him. He must have been the same man, the one she knew years ago in Paris, a badly disfigured man, now become rich and powerful here in New York.'

'I know him. His name is Erik. He has not had an easy life. Now he wors.h.i.+ps another G.o.d.'

'There are no other G.o.ds, Lord.'

'Nice idea, but there are many. Man-made G.o.ds.'

'Ah. And his?'

'He is the servant of Mammon, the G.o.d of greed and gold.'

'I would dearly love to bring him back. To you.'

'Most commendable. And why?'

'It seems he has enormous wealth, riches beyond normal dreams.'

'Joseph, you are supposed to be in the business of souls, not gold. Do you l.u.s.t after his fortune?'

'Not for myself, Lord. For something else.'

'And what might that be?'

'While I have been here I wandered by night through the Lower East Side district of this city, but a few miles from this very cathedral. It is an appalling place, an inferno on earth. There is grinding poverty, squalor, filth, stench and despair. Out of these come every vice and crime. Children are used as prost.i.tutes, boys and girls ...'

'Do I hear a hint of rebuke, Joseph, that I should allow these things?'

'I could not rebuke you, Lord.'

'Oh, don't be too modest. It happens every day.'

'But I cannot understand it.'

'Let me try to explain. I never gave Man a guarantee of perfection, only the chance of it. That was the whole point of it all. Man has the choice and the chance but never the coercion. I have left his freedom to choose inviolate. Some choose to try to follow the path I pointed out; most prefer their pleasures now, here. For many that means inflicting pain on others for their own amus.e.m.e.nt or enrichment. It is noted, of course, but is not to be changed.'

'But why, Lord, can Man not be a better creature?'

'Look, Joseph, if I reached down and touched him on the forehead and made him perfect, what would life on earth be like? No sadness, so no joy. No tears, no smiles. No pain, no relief. No bondage, no freedom. No failure, no triumph. No rudeness, no courtesy. No bigotry, no tolerance. No despair, no exultation. No sins and certainly no redemption. I would simply create a paradise of featureless bliss here on earth, which would make my heavenly kingdom somewhat redundant. And that is not the point of it all. So, Man must have his choice, until I call him home.'

'I suppose so, Lord. But I would dearly like to bring this Erik and all his riches to a better service.'

'Perhaps you will.'

'But there must be a key.'

'Of course, there is always a key.'

'But I cannot see it, Lord.'

'You have read my words. Have you taken nothing in?'

'Too little, Lord. Help me. Please.'