Part 17 (1/2)

2/17/86.

Press secretary Elaine Crispen reports that Nancy Reagan has so far had no time to read her daughter Patti's novel, Home Front Home Front, about a cold mother and a distant father who just happen to be the First Family. Key scene: the new First Lady touring the White House while burbling, ”There's just so much history here! Imagine all the people who have been within these walls. But, good grief, I just can't wait to redecorate.”

2/18/86.

”As I've said before, you can't fight attack helicopters piloted by Cubans with Band-Aids and mosquito nets.”

--President Reagan campaigning for military, not just humanitarian, contra aid 2/20/86.

President Reagan stages a five-hour visit to Grenada, where he is serenaded in a calypso song as ”Uncle Reagan.” Caspar Weinberger snaps photos without removing his lens cap.

2/21/86.

The Wall Street Journal unmasks Vice President Bush as a user of the phrase ”deep doo-doo.” unmasks Vice President Bush as a user of the phrase ”deep doo-doo.”

2/24/86.

Michael Deaver who claims to be ”making far more than I ever thought I would” from his new lobbying firm appears on the cover of Time Time in his black Jaguar talking on a car phone. The cover line reads ”Who Is This Man Calling?” Soon after the magazine hits the stands, Nancy Reagan calls. ”Mike, you made a big mistake,” she says of this flaunting of success. ”I think you're going to regret it.” And, sure enough, he does. in his black Jaguar talking on a car phone. The cover line reads ”Who Is This Man Calling?” Soon after the magazine hits the stands, Nancy Reagan calls. ”Mike, you made a big mistake,” she says of this flaunting of success. ”I think you're going to regret it.” And, sure enough, he does.

2/25/86.

Corazon Aquino is sworn in as the new Philippine president in the wake of a citizen's revolt following Ferdinand Marcos' stealing of the election. At Malacanang Palace, Marcos is also sworn in but, having lost control of the military, he and Imelda accept the US offer of sanctuary. They flee to Hawaii with as much money as they can escape with, though they are forced to leave most possessions behind. Among them: 3,000 pairs of Imelda's shoes, hundreds of matching handbags, thousands of dresses and 500 black bras. Says Women's Wear Daily Women's Wear Daily publisher John Fairchild, ”She spent all this money, but she was never attractively dressed.” publisher John Fairchild, ”She spent all this money, but she was never attractively dressed.”

2/26/86.

”I don't expect you'll hear me writing any poems to the greater glory of Ronald and Nancy Reagan. Why should I?”

--Robert Penn Warren on the occasion of being named the first US poet laureate 2/28/86.

Though the comment exists on tape, President Reagan denies that he called reporters ”sons of b.i.t.c.hes” for asking questions at a photo op. Larry Speakes claims Reagan said, ”It's sunny and you're rich,” though he offers no clue as to what that inane comment would have meant.

2/28/86.

After failing to spin a basketball on her finger, Nancy Reagan resumes her tradition of kissing the bald heads of large black men by bussing Harlem Globetrotter Curly Neal.

MARCH 1986.

3/1/86.

”Some of his statements are almost more than a human being can bear.”

--Jimmy Carter on President Reagan's habitual lying about the nation's military preparedness when he took office 3/3/86.

President Reagan reveals his ignorance of the condition of Central American roads by claiming that victory for the Sandinistas would create ”a privileged sanctuary for terrorists and subversives just two days' driving time from Harlingen, Texas.”

3/3/86.

”They hope Patti finds writing satisfying.”

--Spokesperson Elaine Crispen on the First Couple's reaction to their daughter's literary career 3/5/86.

President Reagan renews his campaign for another $100 million in contra aid. ”If we don't want to see the map of Central America covered in a sea of red, eventually lapping at our own borders,” he warns, ”we must act now.” The House votes no.

3/5/86.

New York Times: MEESE BACKS DRUG TESTS FOR EMPLOYEES 3/5/86.

After watching Bruce Springsteen sign autographs on a flight to Los Angeles, Richard M. Nixon introduces himself to the singer. ”I notice that you sign your full name,” he says. ”And it's such a very long name. When I was vice president, I remember going in to see President Eisenhower while he was signing a stack of letters. He looked at me and said, 'd.i.c.k, you're lucky to have a short name.'”

3/6/86.

Two hours before she is scheduled to appear on The Tonight Show The Tonight Show, Patti Davis who earlier in her publicity tour had been dropped from her mother's friend Merv Griffin's show is told that her appearance has been cancelled by the show's guest host, her mother's friend Joan Rivers.

3/12/86.

”I hope she makes a lot of money. I thought it was interesting fiction.”

--President Reagan's reaction to his daughter Patti's novel 3/13/86.

Federal district judge nominee Jefferson B. Sessions is questioned by the Senate Judiciary Committee about his statement that the Klan was ”okay until I found out they smoked pot,” and about some derogatory comments about the NAACP. ”I may have said something about the NAACP being un-American or Communist,” he admits, ”but I meant no harm by it.” He is the first of President Reagan's judicial appointments to be denied confirmation.

3/14/86.

”I guess in a way they are counter-revolutionary and G.o.d bless them for being that. And I guess that makes them contras and so it makes me a contra, too.”

--President Reagan campaigning for contra aid 3/17/86.

New York Times correction: ”A Miami dispatch yesterday ... described Federal District Judge John J. Sirica incorrectly. He is alive.” correction: ”A Miami dispatch yesterday ... described Federal District Judge John J. Sirica incorrectly. He is alive.”

3/18/86.

Thanks to disorganization among Illinois Democrats and the vaguely foreign-sounding names of their opponents Mark Fairchild and Janice Hart, two disciples of extremist Lyndon LaRouche, win the party's nominations for lieutenant governor and secretary of state. ”We're going to roll our tanks down State Street,” declares Hart at their victory press conference, promising ”Nuremberg tribunals” for drug dealers and mandatory AIDS testing. They are not elected.

3/21/86.

Four years after it was first discredited, President Reagan resurrects his fable about British gun laws in an interview with The New York Times The New York Times. Do any of the three veteran reporters challenge him? To ask the question is to answer it.

3/22/86.

President Reagan invites Nancy on stage at the Gridiron Dinner to say something nice about the press. She stands silently. ”Don't you have just a few kind words?” he asks. ”Won't you say something?” Another pause. ”I'm thinking,” says the First Lady. ”I'm thinking.” Everyone laughs and laughs.

3/24/86.

In an interview broadcast on Oscar night, Barbara Walters talks to the Reagans about their favorite subject: the movies. Discussing fleeting romantic involvements between stars, the President says, ”I coined a term for it. Leading lady-itis, leading man-itis ... I came here and the first picture, June Travis was the leading lady ... And I could see where it did did happen. The picture ended and ” happen. The picture ended and ”

”And you said, 'bye-bye,'” says Nancy.

”And, yeah, I said, 'bye-bye,'” says the President, whose wife pats his knee and says, ”Good boy!”

And which films made the greatest impression on him as a youth? ”Dracula,” he says, ”and, oh the man that's built by the doctor.”