Vol 1 Chapter 1.3 (1/2)
3. I Turned Into A Four Eyed Panda.
Not learning a subject because you dislike that teacher and get bad grades, who bears this outcome? In an adult’s eyes, a children’s rebellions may seem laughable and childish but it’s the only method we know.
Although mom urged me to go apologize to Teacher Zhang, I didn’t. I have no regrets towards this vicious old witch.
After going through my face-on revolt from the homework copying incident, all fear I had towards her turned into extreme hatred. In her cla.s.ses, I brazenly started to sleep on the desk or read novels. If she threw a piece of chalk at me, I would lift my head up high and stare fiercely at her. Don’t you want me to listen to the lesson? Then I will now ‘concentrate deeply’ and listen. I stopped doing my homework. Since she thinks that I copy, then I have to uphold this false reputation so I might as well stop doing my maths homework and copy it all instead.
Perhaps things in the world are like this, the soft are afraid of the hard, the hard are afraid of the perverse and the perverse are afraid of those who don’t fear dying. Although at the time I was small, my hate for Teacher Zhang definitely wasn’t small and with an appearance of being willing to risk everything without fearing death, gradually, Teacher Zhang stopped bothering me.
What was funny yet sad was, when I first wanted to copy homework, I wasn’t able to find homework to copy. In this cla.s.s, I had no friends, everyone who I could borrow homework from were only those sitting in front, back, left and right of me but they all didn’t want to show me. As I was laughing bitterly inside of Teacher Zhang thinking too highly of me, Zhang Jun swaggered over and without a sound, threw his homework on my desk.
I wasn’t able to react for a moment and stared at his homework in a daze. He saw that I didn’t move so a.s.suming that I didn’t want to copy his homework, he said annoyed: “I copied Chen Jin’s work.” Chen Jin was our cla.s.s’ gifted youth, he always got full marks for maths and even if he did a test with his eyes closed, he was still be able to beat everyone by a long way.
I immediately flipped open his homework and started copying. Not knowing why, I felt very grateful inside but I wasn’t able to say “thank you”. With my head buried in the homework, I said in a small voice: “If you did it, I would still copy it.” He snorted sardonically. I don’t know what what he was being sardonic about.
I thought that he had already walked off but after a long time, his voice suddenly came from the top of my head: “Is there anyone who copies like you? Please! Can you at least slightly adjust it?” I immediately scrambled to change it and after I was done, I looked up to ask if it better but he had already long gone.
—
–First paragraph talks about the spread of Taiwan and Hong Kong’s pop culture into Mainland China and the drama characters they were in love with, how Luo Qi Qi secretly sneaked up to watched dramas when her parents were asleep and how her cla.s.smates would fervently discuss it the next day.–
Among the singers from Taiwan and Hong Kong, the Little Tigers were the most popular group. Their stickers and posters were spread around the cla.s.s and all the girls would discuss them. All three of the Little Tigers had fans and who was the best looking was a much debated topic. Their ca.s.sette tapes were pa.s.sed around the cla.s.s, the guys and girls all hummed the tune to ‘Green Apple Park’, ‘Date of the Stars’ and ‘Love’.
As I had no friends, I could only enjoy these from a distance. My only friend were books, all kinds of different books and as long as I could get my hands on it, I would flip through it from beginning to end, no matter if I could understand it or not. When the temperature was warm, I could randomly choose a place to read but when the temperature turned cold, I had nowhere to go.
I acquired a strange hobby: regularly going to the game house to read. I’d spend 20 cents to buy a cup of orange flavored soda, sit curled in a corner reading a book and take a tiny sip after a while so by the time I leave, I’d have exactly one last sip left. To be honest, I didn’t like that orange juice one bit, but inside my tiny heart, I had a strange exchange standard. When I buy a cup of juice, it would seem like I’m not occupying your s.p.a.ce for nothing, I have spent money so I have the right to sit here and read novels.
As time pa.s.sed, I gradually became familiar with the three people playing pool last time. The one who was watching the game is the owner of the business, surname Li, the people around him all call him Brother Li; the one who called me little sister is a teenager called Xu Xiao Bo, he goes to the best middle school in our city, everyone calls him Xiao Bo [Little Bo]; the other was older than him, surname Zhai, but everyone called him Wu Zei [means squid], he goes to technical school. China’s technical schools could in a way be called “camp for bad students” as it is the place where those who aren’t able to pa.s.s entrance examinations for high school or don’t want to study go.
In the beginning, when I went to the store to read, Xiao Bo’s belly nearly burst from laughing, Wu Zei looked at me, his face stated ‘unbelievable’ and he had a ‘you have a mental problem’ expression. He crazily mocked me but no matter what he said, I pretended not to hear anything. To a person who doesn’t want to go home or stay at home, this warm place is beyond a doubt a good place to stay. Although there were many people, they didn’t look at me as a bad student so everything allowed me to be at peace.
Brother Li was actually used to seeing situations like this and didn’t mind me borrowing his warm heating and lighting. He only smiled to Xiao Bo: “Your little friend is very interesting.” Having the boss’s acceptance, I stayed in the game house with a peace of mind.
In the game house, I pretty much finished all the books at home: ‘Legends Old and New’, ‘Dream of the Red Chamber’, ‘The Book and the Sword’, ‘The Eight Immortals Cross the Sea’, ‘Expedition to the East’… Of all the books, my favorite was a damaged novel by Gu Long so I remembered his name firmly. [Gu Long is a wuxia writer.]
When I read, I’ would be completely absorbed n the story. There were some books that I couldn’t stop until I had finished so I would stay up late reading with a torch inside the blankets. As I read more and more books, the words on the blackboard turned more and more blurred. My parents realized that I had turned short sighted when I needed to sit close to the television so they took me to the hospital to get a pair of gla.s.ses.
When I went to the game house wearing my gla.s.ses, Xiao Bai who was helping to look after the store froze for a moment before continuing to work indifferently. As he worked and worked, he couldn’t resist anymore and collapsed on the counter laughing. After he laughed for a while, he straightened up and continued to work indifferently.
When Wu Zei saw me, he didn’t bother to be polite and burst out laughing immediately, saying to Xiao Bo: “This four eyed little sister won’t mock you for being shortsighted anymore.”
None of the people there were shortsighted, I was a rare animal and as Wu Zei mocks: “Intellectual! National treasure! National treasure!” National treasure was an extended meaning for panda, later, Wu Zei started to directly call me “four eyed panda” and even until I was a 16 year old teenager, he was still able to call me “four eyed panda” in front of a group of people.
In primary, it felt like only hard working, diligent students wore gla.s.ses. Ironically, I was last in the cla.s.s [in terms of grades] yet I was one of the first to wear gla.s.ses and be “four eyes”. Once, when we changed seating, I was on the same desk as the prodigy Chen Jin. He had just started wearing gla.s.ses and couldn’t help but ask: “How did you become short sighted?” I laughed: “By watching TV.”
As I completely forget the outside world as soon as I start reading, I was a stupid book loving idiot in Xiao Bo and Wu Zei’s eyes.
The game house would often play popular songs. Once, when the Little Tiger’s ‘Green Apple Park’ started playing, I suddenly raised my head from my book and turned my head sideways, listening very attentively. Xiao Po asked me: “Do you like the Little Tigers?”
I shook my head, then nodded, then shook my head again, I haven’t even listened to their ca.s.sette tapes before, how would I know if I liked them or not?
Wu Zei laughed: “Four eyed panda has turned stupid from reading, she doesn’t even know likes or dislikes anymore.”
I glared at him, not speaking.
When it was time for me to leave, Xiao Po handed me a used ca.s.sette tape: “For you”. The cover of the ca.s.sette tape were the Little Tigers. I took it and happily looked at it for a while before putting it down, silently looking at him. He laughed: “This is for primary kids to listen to, we don’t listen to it much. It’s already old, even if you don’t want it, we’ll probably throw it somewhere in a few days and forget about it.”
I retook the ca.s.sette tape and without saying “thanks”, I ran out of the game room. That night, I hugged our little small tape recorder and listened to the Little Tigers repeatedly, humming the tunes that my cla.s.smates had hummed numerous times and listened carefully to all the songs I had not heard clearly in the past. In midst of the Little Tigers music, I had an absentminded feeling, as if I wasn’t the bad student my cla.s.smates had excluded.
When my little sister heard the music of the Little Tigers, she came voluntarily to my side for the first time, enviously asking me where I got it from.
I smiled and proudly told her that my friend gave it to me. When I said the word “friend”, there was an indescribable warmth inside my heart. That year, I didn’t understand what it was but I subconsciously knew that it was a very, very precious thing.
—
One afternoon, I was curled up inside the game house reading with the sounds of the game machines whirling around me. Occasionally, there would be the sounds of someone swearing in anger over losing a game.
I contently raised up my cup of orange juice to drink when all of a sudden. I heard the sound of crying from the outside. Those earth shattering cries that could scare evil spirits away were too familiar, whenever my dad and mom heard it, their voices will change, first soft, second back away and third agree to everything.
Who else could it be other than my delicate little sister?
I calmly put down my cup and pretending not to hear, lowered my head and continued reading. However, this was the outside world, little sister’s cries won’t be able to call dad and mom here, there’s no one to spoil her and satisfy her every want, so after a few minutes, she was still crying, getting so breathless that she was possibly ready to faint at any moment.
Wu Zei was unable to stand the brain haunting sounds any longer, he lifted up the door blinds and looked outside. Although my head was still down, I couldn’t help but look towards the outside.
Two girls wore middle school uniforms. The one with a side fringe blocked my little sister by the street. Perhaps they were threatening little sister for pocket money, perhaps little sister had offended some cla.s.smate so the students had come to teach her a lesson. Little sister’s cla.s.smate was curled up in a corner trembling, not even daring to fart. The two girls were speaking viciously to little sister but little sister took no notice of what they were saying, only raising her head up to the sky and cried loudly. The scene was very comical.
Based on little sister’s style, they probably haven’t finished what they wanted to say, as soon as they looked viciously, little sister started bawling loudly to the skies. The two girls had not even got to the point yet they’ve already attracted a bunch of bystanders. They kept ordering little sister to close her mouth and stop crying but they didn’t understand my little sister, not only did she not listen to them, her cries got louder. The slightly fatter girl probably thought that her reputation would be severely damaged if she couldn’t even control a little brat so feeling shameful, she raised her hand and give little sister a slap.
I kept telling myself “it has nothing to do with me” but when I saw her slap, before I had realized, I had already charged out the door like an angry bull. Using Wu Zei’s words afterwards, he had only felt a murderous aura pa.s.s by his side and when he looked clearly, I had already brought down the girl.
I lowered my head and rammed straight for the fat girl, slamming right into her chest. Girls of that age were still developing b.r.e.a.s.t.s so getting hit hard, she immediately crouched down in pain. The other girl froze for a while before getting her senses back. Seeing that I was shorter than her, she swelled up with arrogance and raised her hand, wanting to slap me. I dodged nimbly and rushed at her, head b.u.t.ting her while kneeing her. She was taller than me so she grabbed my hair and yanked upwards. Me who was fighting for the first time learned immediately, I grabbed her hair and with force, pulled downwards.
At the time, I felt pain all around my body but my ruthless drive came back and I wanted to use all methods to attack her. She pulled my hair so I used more strength to pull her hair back, she pinched me so I used more strength to pinch her back. When we rolled on to the floor, she tried to use her nails to scratch my face. I showed no sign of weakness and used my hand to scratch her back, evenusing my mouth to fiercely bite down then no matter how much she hit or struggled, I refused to open my mouth. The smell of blood in my mouth grew stronger and stronger but I still did not open my mouth, using all my strength to bite down.
Suddenly, she started to cry, crying even louder than my little sister.
Wu Zei and Xiao Bo grabbed one person each and separated us. When I was being dragged away by Xiao Bo, I still used both my feet to keep kicking the middle school girl I had made cry.
Wu Zei and Xiao Bo both looked at me stupidly, as if they were looking at a little monster.