Vol 1 Chapter 2.2 (1/2)
2. Grandpa Pa.s.sed Away
Time is brief, instant, therefore love and warmth are always in a hurry, there is no time to cherish it, with a blink of the eye, it has already pa.s.sed.
Time is also endless, long, therefore those love and warmth are engraved forever in your heart, unable to be forgotten, for life.
I don’t know when the popularity started, but by the time I knew about it, the entire year of boys and girls were rollerskating. Roller skates during that era were very simple and crude. They were just four wheels with a few pieces of metal on top with a soft leather strap attached. The metal sheets could be adjusted for size so there was no need to take off your shoes as the roller skates were attached to them.
There weren’t many students in our year with roller skates so everyone would crowd around those few people who did have a pair and line up to take turns playing on them. Zhang Jun never fell behind on these popular things, when other boys were tottering around, walking on their skates, he was already able to skate backwards. All of a sudden, he turned into the most popular guy as all the girls wanted to borrow his roller skates and needed him to teach them how to skate.
I watched them trip around on the concrete from afar. In the depth of my heart, I longed to join them yet I acted like I wasn’t the slightest bit interested. I didn’t want to curry up to someone just for the sake of a pair of roller skates, even if that person was Zhang Jun, especially if that person was Zhang Jun.
—
After mom received a telegram, she suddenly announced that she had to go back to her hometown and told little sister and I to listen to our dad. I asked her if she could bring me along too , but she replied that I had to study and couldn’t skip school.
At night I stayed up writing a very long letter, telling grandpa that everything was great, there was a Teacher Gao who treated me very well, and praised that I was smart, the students all like me, I have lots of friends, I have already read lots of books, I will grow up very quickly and when I grew up, I will go visit him, accompany him fis.h.i.+ng…
The next day, mom hurriedly left. I looked forward to her return and imagined what my grandpa would give me. Perhaps it will be a pair of roller skates. I’ll skate really, really well and let Zhang Jun be surprised.
A week or so later, mom haggardly returned, thinner than before. I pestered her, asking, “did grandpa see my letter? Did he give me any presents? What did he say…”
Dad pulled me to a corner and told me, “your grandpa had esophageal cancer. He’s already pa.s.sed away and mom is very sad. Don’t pester after her mentioning grandpa anymore.” I stared at dad, stupefied. Dad gave me $5 and said, “go out to play, when you’re hungry, you can go and buy something to eat.”
I held onto the money and left the house. In the emptiness between heaven and earth, I didn’t know where to go. Grandpa pa.s.sed away? Pa.s.sing away means that the person has disappeared from earth? I will never see him again. I yearned to grow up because after I grow up, I can go back to his side, but what should I do now? What should I do when I grow up? Where can I go?
Xiao Bo was sweeping outside the game house when he noticed me. Smiling, he asked, “whats wrong? What’s wrong with your expression?”
“I’ll treat you to lamb skewers,” I replied.
He was dumbfounded for a moment. We were both cheapskates and didn’t spend money often. We practically never bought snacks. For me, it was because I wanted use the money to rent books whereas he seemed to have a hobby of saving up money. Today, I unexpectedly changed my nature and became generous. He stood the broom up against the wall and cheered, “Sure!”
We walked to the lamb skewer stand in the corner of the street. I handed the five dollars to person skewering and said, “twenty lamb skewers, ten with little chili, ten with lots of chili.”
“Put some more chili, put some more chili….” Under my directions, my lamb skewers pretty much turned into chili skewers.
We ate the lamb skewers as we walked. When it entered my mouth, my mouth was on fire from the spiciness, yet I continued to eat it one bite at a time. Xiao Bo held his lamb skewers and silently looked at me.
After finis.h.i.+ng all my lamb skewers, I wiped my tears as I said, “it’s really spicy!”
No matter how much I wiped, I couldn’t wipe away the tears. It was like a dam had burst; the water all flowed out. Furthermore, my tears were increasing more and more. I felt very embarra.s.sed and started to run away. Xiao Bo grabbed my arm and took me back to the yard.
I stood underneath the grapevine and facing the wall, the tears came gus.h.i.+ng down. He sat on the billiard table, silently watching me.
I don’t know how long I cried for, but it was probably a long time because in the middle, Wu Zei tried to come in and was driven out by Xiao Bo. There were also a few people who wanted to come and place bets but were also rejected by Xiao Bo.
After my tears stopped, I wiped my face with my sleeve and turned back around. Xiao Bo asked, “Are you hungry? I’ll treat you to beef noodles.”
I nodded and the two of us went to eat beef noodles. In the beef noodle shop, I covered my face and told him, “my grandpa pa.s.sed away.”
He was silent. I continued, “mom and dad thinks I am young and don’t remember but actually I remember it all, everything related to grandpa, I remember it all, because I miss him.” My tears started forming in my eyes again. I didn’t dare to continue so I started eating the noodles.
After we finished eating, Xiao Bo took my to a small shop* and said, “I want to buy some snacks, what do you think is good?”
*[A small convenience store that sells snacks and cigarettes]
Without any hesitation, I pointed at the the chocolates and said, “the ones with alcohol fillings are tastier.”
“Chocolates with alcohol fillings? Give me half a jin*”
*[Jin is the standard unit of weight in China, 1 Jin= 500 grams so 1/2 Jin= 250grams]
Xiao Bo got half a jin of chocolate with alcohol fillings. He ate one and also invited me to eat them. I unwrapped one and put it in my mouth, my heart was in agony yet my mouth was filled with sweetness.
At night when I got home, mom handed me a hand copied version of ‘The Heaven Sword and Light Saber’, “your grandpa transcribed this book. Originally your grandpa left you tens of thousands of dollars…” Mom softly sighed, “mom only brought this back for you, take good care of it.”
Mom’s haggardness and exhaustion made her seem darker and skinnier. She didn’t know my sorrows yet I could understand her sorrows. I softly said, ” you should sleep early.”
Mom touched my head and went out the room.
I opened ‘The Heaven Sword and Light Saber’ and started to read. Although I’ve already read the book, ‘The Book and The Sword’, and I’ve watched the television series, ‘The Legend of the Condor Heroes’, Jin Yong’s name was still unfamiliar to me. I haven’t read ‘The Return of the Condor Heroes’ either, so when I saw Guo Xiang roam to the ends of the world on her donkey, although I felt sad, I was still muddleheaded. When I read to chapter 3, the first sentence: “Flowers bloom and wither. The young men in the martial world have become old. The young girls have begun to show their age with hair turning white……”
*[The Heaven Sword and Light Saber is a wuxia novel written by Jin Yong (Louis Cha) and the third in the Condors Trilogy. The first in the series is ‘The Legend of the Condor Heroes’ and the second is ‘The Return of the Condor Heroes’. ‘The Book and The Sword’ is another novel written by Jin Yong.]