Part 4 (1/2)
Tyler told himself to stop being foolish. Daisy disliked him too much to care what he looked like. She was even less interested in whether he was hiding behind his beard to escape comparison with his brothers. She'd probably forget him within a week after she left.
But he wouldn't forget her. He had never held any woman in his arms while she cried out her grief. He knew that had changed a part of him forever.
He took off his coat and gloves, unlaced his boots, poured a little hot water in a basin and diluted it with cold. On stocking feet, taking care to avoid any board he remembered squeaked, he tiptoed over to the bed. Kneeling down, he dipped a handkerchief in the water. Being as gentle as he could, he washed the tear stains from her cheeks.
She didn't move.
When he had finished, he slid her down until she lay her flat in the bed. For a moment he thought she would wake, but she merely sighed and rolled into a ball. He pulled the covers over her and stepped back.
He felt guilty for having wanted to be rid of her. But he and Zac were strangers, and there was nothing they could do for her. She probably wanted to get away from them. She had no reason to like them or to feel she could depend on them. When it came right down to it, she had no reason to trust them except that she was alone and vulnerable. She must be terrified.
Tyler decided he would have to think of some way to relieve her anxiety. It must be terrible to live in fear. He had never felt like that, but he imagined it must be terrible.
He wondered if she would be safe at the Cochranes. He was not without his weakness for women, and he had no reason to believe Zac was a saint, but neither of them would consider taking advantage of a helpless female. He had heard of the Cochranes, but he didn't know them.
As he started to prepare dinner, he couldn't help but wonder what would happen to Daisy when he took her to town. She wouldn't want to depend on the hospitality of friends for long, and she had already said she wouldn't return to her relatives back East. Neither could she run that ranch by herself.
The only other solution was marriage.
But she couldn't find a decent husband looking like she did now. He didn't mean the freckles. They didn't bother him. In fact, they intrigue him. They were like snowflakes, every one was different. They had a friendly look about them, like they were announcing she was a woman with a sense of humor.
No, it was the scar, the singed hair, and her size that worried him. The only men who would marry her now were men who made virtual slaves out of their wives. He had seen such women during his wanderings over the Southwest, women worn out, overworked, and colorless, women who had given up on life.
Daisy deserved better than that. Not that it was his business to worry about who she married, but he couldn't help thinking about it. She was a gutsy woman. She had taken a tremendous shock without hysterics. He imagined she realized what she faced in the months ahead. Still, all she had done was cry silently so she wouldn't disturb Zac.
Daisy woke to the sounds of hushed conversation and the muted clink and rattle of dinner preparations. She started to turn over when one of Zac's sentences emerged from the hush with startling clarity.
”Do you like her?”
”Why do you ask?” Tyler questioned.
”You're falling all over yourself to please her.”
”I'm just trying to do the best I can for her while she's hurt. What else did you expect me to do? Once she goes to Albuquerque, I doubt I'll ever see her again.”
Daisy heard the soft sc.r.a.ping of spoon against pot.
”Dinner's ready. Is she awake?”
”No. Want me to wake her?”
”No. Let her sleep.”
He doesn't want to be bothered with me, Daisy thought. He'll be glad when I'm gone. That was okay. She'd be glad when she left. But somehow that didn't make her feel better, certainly not good enough to get up to eat. Giving in to the exhaustion that weighed her down, she drifted back to sleep.
Daisy came half awake. A comforting sense of warmth pervaded her whole being. She snuggled closer, her entire body luxuriating in the warmth. She turned over. But just as she was about to slip over the edge into oblivion, she realized the heat was coming from a virtual wall next to her. Still more than half asleep, Daisy became aware the wall was neither flat nor straight. It curved as her own body curved.
She froze. Zac was in the bed with her.
But even as the thought flashed through her mind, she heard soft snoring coming from the bunk above her.
Tyler! It had to be.
What could she do? She couldn't lie here nestled against his back. Neither could she start screaming. Gradually the panic receded. He was only sleeping with her to keep her warm. That had to be it.
Daisy eased away from Tyler until her body was pressed hard against the log wall of the cabin. She kept telling herself he wouldn't do anything to harm her. But no matter how much she rea.s.sured herself, she couldn't sleep. It was all she could do to stay in the bed.
Daisy felt the cold gradually settle around her. That didn't bother her as much as the realization that something in her wanted to stay close to Tyler. His presence made her feel warm and loved, like when she was a little girl and her father let her sit on his lap. She had felt beautiful then.
But that wasn't all. Her body responded to Tyler's presence in a way that startled her. She detected a kind of warmth, or heat, that caused her muscles to become taut, her skin to feel extra sensitive, her stomach to flutter nervously. Her lips felt dry. She moistened them with the end of her tongue. Even her b.r.e.a.s.t.s felt funny, a kind of tingle running through them. She felt cold and hot at the same time.
All in all, she felt quite unlike herself.
It shouldn't have happened. She didn't want it to. Several minutes pa.s.sed before the p.r.i.c.kly sensations began to fade and die away. She made up her mind she wouldn't let it happen again.
Daisy woke up starving. She sat up in the bed, and a pain shot through her head. She sank back to the pillow wondering what could have happened to make her head ache so. She put her hand to her head, encountered the heavy bandage.
Everything came rus.h.i.+ng back.
For a moment, the shock of her father's death nearly overwhelmed her. It seemed unreal. But she remembered the shot, seeing him lying on the floor.
Once again tears welled up in her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. Once again she felt bereft, alone, abandoned. But she couldn't afford to give in to her grief. She was alone now. There was no one to take care of her but herself.
But she was not alone. Tyler was in her bed.
She turned her head, but Tyler wasn't there. Surely she couldn't have dreamed it. Nothing else in this horrible nightmare had been a dream. But there was no question about it, Tyler was not in her bed.
Taking care not to move too quickly, Daisy sat up. The fire had gone out, and the room was bitterly cold. She pulled the blankets tightly about her. Her head hurt, and the room spun before her eyes, but she could see Tyler asleep on the floor between the stove and the door. His feet hung off the thin mattress from the knees down. She was sleeping in his bed, and he was sleeping on her mattress.
She felt a pang of guilt. Tyler was silent, bossy, and taciturn, but he had taken care of her. He had held her while she cried. Despite what he said to Zac, she didn't believe he had done it just because she was sick. She wasn't experienced with men, but for a moment she had felt truly cared for. She thought she had sensed a reluctance to let her go. Maybe he didn't like her, but he wasn't as devoid of human compa.s.sion as he pretended.
Without warning, Tyler rolled into a sitting position, and Daisy found herself looking directly into his eyes.
Chapter Four.
Daisy turned away almost immediately. His gaze was too direct, too disconcerting. Besides, she was convinced he had spent at least part of the night in her bed. The implied intimacy embarra.s.sed her. It also had the same startling effect on her body she remembered from last night. She recognized the warmth of embarra.s.sment as it flowed upward and threatened to flame in her face.
”When can I go home?” she asked. It wasn't what she meant to say. Those warm, brown eyes in that s.h.a.ggy face raised conflicting emotions in her. She wanted to flee, yet she wanted to stay, to find out what he was really like behind that beard.
She had to do something. She couldn't just lie there with him looking at her. Tyler moved first. He threw back the covers, and sat up. Daisy was relieved to discover he had slept fully clothed.
”You're too weak to travel.”