11 Put on Your Best Show! (1/2)

In the restroom of the Sweetheart Cafe, Jessica stared at her reflection in the mirror. She took a long inhale and then exhaled heavily. Then, she patted her face with her ice-cold hands.

She didn't understand why she was so angry, either. She only remembered that, at that very moment, her heart was filled with anxiety and worry. Then, the last thing she knew was being out of control… why did it happen? She knew that she wasn't really angry about Mark Slate's joke. The joke was just the fuse igniting the bomb. The reason could be that she had felt that she was being excluded unintentionally, or that Wang Yang turned down her offer of playing the leading actress in his movie. It also could be that Rachel was so much talented than she was…

With the sound of a door opening, Rachel walked in. She approached Jessica with an amicable smile and asked, ”Jessica, are you okay?”

Jessica looked at Rachel's reflection in the mirror and forced a smile, saying, ”Thank you. I'm fine. I'm really sorry. Just now, I was… I wasn't acting like myself.” She pulled her hair around her ear, looked so regretful. ”I don't even know what got into me. I just went insane all of a sudden.”

”That's okay, Jessica. Don't worry about it. We all care about you very much.” Rachel comforted her for a while, and then continued, ”Is this because of the leading actress audition?”

Jessica shook her head, ”Oh, I don't know. Maybe I was just not feeling very well.” Due to her childhood experience, Jessica had always had a rather defensive attitude toward strangers. She had known Rachel for less than two hours, so she wouldn't reveal all of her true feelings now.

Rachel smiled slightly, and she knew how to deal with this situation. In fact, she had plenty of friends in Toronto, and whenever they were in a bad mood, she would be there for them. She was a very good listener. Actually, she had had many experiences resolving problems like Jessica's. Apparently, Jessica's feelings were hurt by something, but she buried the reason deep in her heart.

She must try to let the steam out. But Rachel knew that, if she didn't open up the topic first, Jessica would never tell her feelings. Therefore, she said, ”I'm really sorry, you know. I got a little carried away discussing the movie stuff with Wang Yang…”

”No, no, it's not your fault.” Jessica interrupted. But when she thought of the time when Rachel and Wang Yang hit it off so quickly over the topic of movies, and she was like a fool standing beside them, her heart twitched again. Then, she sighed. ”It's all because of me. Maybe I shouldn't have come here today.”

”I know it must be very rough. I have these kinds of feelings all the time. Sometimes, when my friends talked about something, but I had no clue about their topic, I would totally feel like I was excluded.” Rachel mocked herself, and then shrugged smilingly. Her positive voice was really infectious, ”But I know they didn't do that on purpose. They did that only because they think of you as a close friend, so they don't have to pay attention to your feelings all the time.”

Jessica had to admit that Rachel's word was rather reasonable, so her expression loosened up.

”And I can tell Yang is so passionate and obsessed about movies. I have met many people in my college just like him. They could be crazy sometimes.” Rachel rolled her eyes and made fun of the ”crazy people”. ”Wow, whenever they talk about movies or any topic related to movies, they'll go 'blah, blah, blah' for days and nights straight. You just can't stop them at all, not even for a minute.”

Rachel smiled and said, ”That's just who they are. Movies are in every cell of them.”

”Yeah, I know that,” Jessica said, finally putting on a smiling face again. She smiled slightly with a trace of pride and said, ”Yang is absolutely the most persistent person. Even since he was very little, he had made up his mind to be a big-shot director. And he has been chasing his dream ever since. Actually, among all of my friends, he is the most enthusiastic one. He has never changed.”

When Jessica finally opened up to her, Rachel knew it was a great chance to further their conversation, so then she asked, ”Ever since he was very little? So, it means you knew each other when you were kids?”

”No, it's not like we always knew each other.” Jessica thought for a while and explained, ”Well, that was when we were in the second grade. I got transferred to Yang's school. Then, we became very good friends, but only for a very short time. After that, I moved to LA with my family.”

Jessica turned around and stretched her arms backward on the restroom sink, then smiled happily. ”We only recently met each other again. But both of us have grown up.” She felt a little unconfident looking at Rachel. She deliberately used the word ”recently”, because she didn't want Rachel to know that Wang Yang and her had run into each other only less than one week ago.

”Wow, it sounds so romantic.” Rachel smiled.

”Yeah, maybe.” Jessica pretended that she didn't really care about it and then shrugged. ”Sometimes, LA could be very small.”

”Yang helped me many times when we were kids, so I'm very grateful to him. Now he is in trouble, but I can't do anything to help him. I hate it.” Suddenly, Jessica's emotions went down like a rollercoaster and she said, ”Maybe that's why I got so angry.”

Rachel was confused and asked, ”In trouble?”

”Yeah, in trouble. But I shouldn't be the one who tells you the story. If you wanna know, you could ask him.” Jessica shook her head and said, ”Anyway, I feel so guilty that I couldn't offer any help at all. I'm useless.”

Then she started to mock herself, ”Now, everyone is telling me 'Wow, you're so pretty!' But so what, what can I do with 'being pretty'? There are just too many pretty girls out there. I have failed more than ten auditions in a row. They all told me I wasn't good enough. Sometimes, I just feel like maybe it's true; maybe I am not good enough. Maybe it was pure luck that I got several roles in the previous movies. And now, my luck is running out, so I become who I really am again.”

Rachel tried to comfort her. ”Jessica, don't you think like this. That's life. Life is full of ups and downs, isn't it? If that's God's plan, then He has his purpose. What we need to do is listen carefully.”