Part 3 (1/2)

How did those get there?!

MOM.

Let me ask you-do you actually like looking at those? They look so fake.

GREG.

You know what this is? They, uh, have these new pop-up ads on Facebook, and they're basically just p.o.r.nthey just appear randomly sometimes- MOM.

Real b.r.e.a.s.t.s do not look like water balloons.

GREG.

It's an ad.

MOM.

Greg, I'm not stupid.

So it turns out leukemia is cancer of the blood cells. It's the most common kind of cancer that teenagers get, although the specific kind Rachel had-acute myelogenous leukemia-is not the normal kind for teens. ”Acute” means that the leukemia basically came out of nowhere and is growing really quickly, and ”myelogenous” has to do with bone marrow. Essentially, Rachel's blood and bone marrow were being invaded by aggressive, fast-moving cancer cells. I was picturing her in my mind, with her big teeth and frizzy hair, under this invisible microscopic attack, with all these screwed-up things floating around in her veins. Now I actually was getting really upset. But instead of crying, I sort of wanted to throw up.

GREG.

Does everyone know about this?

MOM.

I think Rachel's family is keeping it pretty secret, for now.

GREG.

alarmed So am I not supposed to know about it?

MOM.

acting a little weird No, honey. It's fine if you know about it.

GREG.

But why?

MOM.

Well, I was talking to Denise. And, you know, we decided that you were someone who could make Rachel feel better.

starting to nag Rachel can really use a friend, honey.

GREG.

OK.

MOM.

She can really use someone to make her laugh.

GREG.

OK OK.

MOM.

And I just think, if you spend some time- GREG.

OK OK Jesus Christ.

Mom gives Greg a sad and knowing look.

MOM.

It's OK to be upset.

I sat there, paralyzed by the problem of what to say. What can you possibly say to a dying person? Who might not even know that you know that they're dying? I made a list of opening lines, and none of them seemed like they would be any good.

Opening line: Hey, this is Greg. You want to hang out?

Probable response: Rachel: Why do you want to hang out with me all of a sudden?

Greg: Because we don't have that much time left, to hang out.

Rachel: So, you just want to hang out with me because I'm dying.

Greg: I just want to get in some Rachel time! You know! While I still can.

Rachel: This is probably the most insensitive conversation I have ever had with anyone.

Greg: Do-over time.

Opening line: Hey, this is Greg. I heard about your leukemia, and I'm calling to make you feel better.

Probable response: Rachel: Why would you calling make me feel better?

Greg: Because! Uh. I dunno!

Rachel: You're just reminding me of all those times you never wanted to hang out with me.