Part 17 (2/2)

ola, our stalker, is a man whom we do not much admire. He is a big, handsome fellow, with a light beard and moustache, and rather a weak face; and his good qualities are extreme cleverness at almost any kind of work--carpentry, smith's work, needlework, and saddlery, all seem to come alike to him--and as a deer-stalker he is first-rate, and never makes a mistake. But we fear that his profession at home is to be an independent gentleman, and he is very lazy, and nearly always sulky.

This sulkiness annoys us more than anything else, but we also get very angry with him for being afraid of everything. He is afraid to go in the canoes, and nothing has ever induced him to enter either of them. He is afraid of rowing against a wind, or going out stalking on two successive days, lest he should tire himself; and he is afraid of was.h.i.+ng up plates and pans lest he should lose dignity, but it does not bore him to sit by and watch other people perform the operation.

The Gjende fly was a marvellous sight to-day; we thought him numerous before, but we little knew the acc.u.mulated villany of which this noxious creature is capable. Every fly that we saw here a week ago has now got a large and healthy family of some hundreds, and a darkness which may be felt broods over the river and its sh.o.r.es. And now that the cold weather has set in, he begins to perceive that his short but effectual career of annoyance draws near to its close, and the whole face of nature is covered with torpid crawling things, that make one turn in disgust from everything one touches. May his end come soon, for we love him not.

[Ill.u.s.tration: A Norwegian Fire-place]

We are very comfortable here at night sitting round the n.o.ble fireplace in the corner of the room. These corner fireplaces are found in every saeter and homestead in this part of the country, and are very picturesque and cheery, vastly superior to the modern stove, that may be seen standing up gaunt and inhospitable in every house in more civilised regions. Most of them have the chimney supported by a crooked piece of birch wood coming down from the roof and hooked underneath the projecting angle of stonework, but in some there is instead an upright iron bar from the hearth. Generally speaking, they are placed quite against the wall in the corner, but we have seen several with a s.p.a.ce behind large enough to walk through, and one which even had a bed behind it.

_September 6._--The sea on Gjendin has organised something remarkably like a ground swell under the influence of the continuous storm, and its fury is more magnificent than ever; no boat here would have a chance of living in it.

Esau spent the morning packing his bird-skins in a wooden box for their journey home, as we hardly expect to get much more in the way of specimens. Then we had another afternoon at ryper, not quite so lucky as yesterday, but still satisfactory. When we returned we found that Andreas had brought from Besse Saeter a vast pile of literature which had been acc.u.mulating at the Vaage post office for the last month. After dinner, when we were all buried in our respective letters and papers, occasionally reading out particularly interesting sc.r.a.ps of news, Ragnild came in and informed us that a certain Norwegian, whom we may call Mr. Fox, had come there to fish. This was a man who had done some business for us here two years ago, and we had had a little correspondence with him before coming out this year. Thinking we might have given him some trouble, and not having any great liking for his character, we naturally wished to be especially civil to him; so we asked Ragnild to bring him in and stay to interpret for us.

Presently he entered the room, and after greeting us sat down and refused to have anything to drink: this astonished us so much that it completely drove our small stock of smaller talk out of our heads. The commonplaces of polite conversation sound perfectly ridiculous when gravely uttered to an interpreter for transmission to the proper recipient, and so Ragnild seemed to think, for her translation always sounded much shorter than our flowery sentences. We tried a variety of feeble questions to which we already knew the answers, somewhat in the following style:--

'We presume, Mr. Fox, that you like Norwegian cheese?'

'Does your brother also like Norwegian cheese?'

'Do you speak German?'

'No? but your brother, we believe, plays the Norwegian german-flute?'

'The friends of your sister's children are also our friends. They live in England, but we believe they still like Norwegian cheese.'

'We like much the cheese of the country, and have never suffered asphyxia from it.'

'We shall take a small quant.i.ty with us to England for the destruction of rats;' and so forth.

Presently Esau, getting impatient, suggested in a loud voice that we should 'ask him some questions out of Bennett's Phrase-book.' Then he was covered with shame, as he feared that Ragnild would immediately translate this to Mr. Fox; but fortunately she did not.

On reference later to the said Phrase-book we find that some very appropriate and useful sentences may be gleaned from its fertile pages.

For instance, 'Who are you? What sort of weather is it to-day?' (these two remarks are introductory, as it were, and to inspire confidence in the person addressed). Then we come to the point: 'Will you lend me a dollar? Be quick! Thank you, you are very kind.' Here the speaker would turn to Ragnild and proceed thus: 'Put this in my carpet bag. Make haste and bring me a light, open, four-wheeled phaeton carriage, drawn by one horse.' Then to Mr. Fox, 'Good morning; I must go, but I shall return in a month.' Then the speaker might wink at John and depart.

Now came the most awful pause that the history of the world in its darkest moments can yet point to. We coughed and glared at each other, and felt in our pockets as if we might find something to say there; and then the Skipper had a brilliant idea, and said, 'Ask Mr. Fox how long he intends to stay here.' But Ragnild at once replied, 'Only two days,'

without referring the question to him at all; so that remark was wasted, and our embarra.s.sment became worse than ever; for now not only had we to invent subjects of conversation, but also to put them in such a form that Ragnild should not be able to answer them without taking Mr. Fox into her confidence. He all the time was most annoying, as he would do literally nothing to keep up his end of the conversation, and replied to our lengthiest and most brilliant efforts of exuberant verbosity by monosyllables and inarticulate grunts.

At last, in desperation we presented him with a very nice new English knife, for which he did not seem to care at all; and so we parted, both sides feeling that the interview had been a failure.

The following note is extracted from one of the journals:--'The common cheese of Great Britain is unknown in Norway, but in the roadside inn, the smallest saeter or farmhouse, and the humble cottage dwelling, the traveller can always obtain that excellent subst.i.tute, the goat's-milk cheese of the country.' The colour of this excellent subst.i.tute is that of Windsor soap; its consistency, leather; and its scent, decomposed glue, which causes the natives to keep it under a gla.s.s shade. If you eat it, your own dog will shun you; if you avoid it, you starve.

_September 7._--Esau always wakes up in the most boisterous spirits, and as the part.i.tions between the cabins are only made of thin boards full of knot-holes, he can be heard all over the house the first thing in the morning jeering at John, who sleeps next door, whistling, and crowing like a baby in his cot: he continues these little games long after breakfast-time, and though he is wide awake, will _not_ get up. All this sounds very pleasant and cheery to talk about, but the Skipper, who usually wakes in a temper the reverse of angelic, being influenced by an unequal liver, wishes that these walls were twice as thick, and that Esau was at Hong Kong.

Generally he tries little stratagems to induce Esau to get up, dressing operations having a tendency to quiet him. Sometimes he enters the room sniffing, and remarks, 'How deuced good the coffee smells roasting!' or 'We're going to have a tip-top fish for breakfast, but there's very little of that pie left; enough for two of us p'raps' (this would mean about eight pounds). Or he looks out of the window, and a.s.suming an att.i.tude of intense surprise, hanging on to the frame like Irving in 'the Bells,' says, 'By George, Esau! there's a fellow just below looking through a binocular that can give yours six lengths for mechanism.' If all these expedients fail, he gives in, and dresses quickly with his ears full of tow, leaving Esau aloft, and gets into the eating-room, where the floor and ceiling between put a soft pedal on operatic selections.

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