Part 15 (1/2)

”I was just telling you,” he interposed.

It seemed hard luck that he should find a native of Cashel in the Pimlico registrar's office. He had intended to keep his marriage a secret, as did w.i.l.l.y Brookes, and for a moment the new danger thrilled him. It was intolerable to have to put up with this creature's idle loquacity, but not wis.h.i.+ng to offend him he endured it a little longer.

When the clerk paused in his narrative of the four gentlemen who had stopped the car to have some refreshment, Frank made a resolute stand against any fresh developments of the story, and succeeded in extracting some particulars concerning the marriage laws. And within the next few days all formalities were completed, and Frank's marriage fixed for the end of the week--for Friday, at a quarter to eleven. He slept lightly that night, was out of bed before eight, and mistaking the time, arrived at the office a few minutes before ten.

He met the old man in gray clothes in the pa.s.sage, and this time he was not to be evaded.

”Are you the gentleman who's come to be married by special license, sir?”

”Yes.”

”Neither Mr. Southey--that is the Registrar--nor Mr. Freeman--that's the a.s.sistant-Registrar--has yet arrived, sir.”

”It is very extraordinary they should be late. Do they never keep their appointments?”

”They rarely arrives before ten, sir.”

”Before ten! What time is it now?”

”Only just ten. I am the regular attendant. I'll see yer through it; no necessity to hagitate yerself. It will be done quietly in a private room--a very nice room too, fourteen feet by ten high--them's the regulations; all the chairs covered with leather; a very nice comfortable room. Would yer like to see the room? Would yer like to sit down there and wait? There's a party to be married before you.

But they won't mind you. He's a butcher by trade.”

”And what is she?”

”I think she's a tailoress; they lives close by here, they do.”

”And who are you, and where do you live?”

”I'm the regular attendant; I lives close by here.”

”Where close by?”

”In the work'us; they gives me this work to do.”

”Oh, you are a pauper, then?”

”Yease; but I works here; I'm the regular attendant. No need to be afraid, sir; it's all done in a private room; no one will see you.

This way, sir; this way.”

The sinister aspect of things never appealed to Frank, and he was vastly amused at the idea of the pauper Mercury, and had begun to turn the subject over, seeing how he could use it for a queer story for the _Pilgrim_. But time soon grew horribly long, and to kill it he volunteered to act as witness to the butcher's marriage, one being wanted. The effects of a jovial night, fortified by some matutinal potations, were still visible in the small black eyes of the rubicund butcher--a huge man, apparently of cheery disposition; he swung to and fro before the s.h.i.+ny oak table as might one of his own carca.s.ses.

His bride, a small-featured woman, wrapped in a plaid shawl, evidently fearing that his state, if perceived by the Registrar, might cause a postponement of her wishes, strove to s.h.i.+eld him. His pal and a stout girl, with the air of the coffee-shop about her, exchanged winks and grins, and at the critical moment, when the Registrar was about to read the declaration, the pal slipped behind some friends and, catching the bridegroom by the collar, whispered, ”Now then, old man, pull yourself together.” The Registrar looked up, but his spectacles did not appear to help him; the a.s.sistant-Registrar, a tall, languid young man, who wore a carnation in his b.u.t.ton-hole, yawned and called for order. The room was lighted by a skylight, and the light fell diffused on the hands and faces; and alternately and in combination the whiskied breath and the carnation's scent a.s.sailed the nostrils. Suddenly the silence was broken by the Registrar, who began to read the declarations. ”I hereby declare that I, James Hicks, know of no impediment whereby I may not be joined in matrimony with Matilde, Matilde--is it Matilde or Matilda?”

”I calls her Tilly when I am a-cuddling of her; when she riles me, and gets my dander up, I says, 'Tilder, come here!'” and the butcher raised his voice till it seemed like an ox's bellow.

”I really must beg,” exclaimed the Registrar, ”that the sanct.i.ty of--the gravity of this ceremony is not disturbed by any foolish frivolity. You must remember ...” But at that moment the gla.s.sy look of the butcher's eyes reached the old gentleman's vision, and a heavy hiccup fell upon his ears. ”I really think, Mr. Freeman, that that gentleman, one of the contracting parties I mean, is not in a fit state--is in a state bordering on inebriation. Will you tell me if this is so?”

”I didn't notice it before,” said Mr. Freeman, stifling a yawn, ”but now you mention it, I really think he is a little drunk, and hardly in a fit ...”

”I ne--ver was more jolly, jolly dog in my life (hiccup)--when you gentlemen have made it (hiccup) all squ--square between me and my Tilly” (a violent hiccup),--then suddenly taking her round the waist, he hugged her so violently that Matilda could not forbear a scream,--”I fancy I shall be, just be a trifle more jolly still....

If any of you ge--gen'men would care to join us--most 'appy, Tilly and me.”