Part 82 (1/2)
”I own that I am somewhat inclined that way,” said I.
”As you please.”
”Why? Are you unwell?”
He lay silent for a few moments, then:
”What a mortifying business was that at the Tioga fort,” he said under his breath. ”The entire garrison saw it, did they not, Loskiel? Colonel Shreve and all?”
”Yes, I fear so,”
”It will be common gossip tomorrow,” he said bitterly. ”What a miserable affair to happen to an officer of Morgan's!”
”A sad affair,” I said.
”It will come to her ears, no doubt. Shreve's batt-men will carry it down the river.”
I was silent.
”Rumour runs the woods like lightning,” he said. ”She will surely hear of this disgraceful scene. She will hear of it at Easton.... Strange,”
he muttered, ”strange how the old truths hold!... Our sins shall find us out.... I never before believed that, Loskiel--not in a wilderness, anyway.... I had rather be here dead and scalped than have had that happen and know that she must hear of it one day.”
He lay motionless for a while, then turned heavily on his side, facing me across the heap of dead leaves.
”Somehow or other,” he said, ”she heard of that miserable business--heard of it even at Otsego.... That is why she would not marry me, Loskiel. Did you ever hear the like! That a man must be so utterly and hopelessly d.a.m.ned for a moment's careless folly--lose everything in the world for a thoughtless moonlight frolic! Where lies the justice in such a judgment?”
”It is not the world that judges you severely. The world cares little what a man's way may be with a maid.”
”But--Lana cares. It has ended everything for her.”
I said in a low voice:
”You ended everything for Dolly Glenn.”
”How was I to know she was no light o' love--this camp tailoress--this silly little wench who--but let it go! Had she but whimpered, and seemed abashed and unfamiliar with a kiss---- Well, let it go.... But I could cut my tongue out that I ever spoke to her. G.o.d! How lightly steps a man into a trap of his own contriving!... And here I lie tonight, caring not whether I live or die in tomorrow's battle already dawning on the Chemung. And yonder, south of us, in the black starlight, drift the batteaux, dropping down to Easton under the very sky that s.h.i.+nes above us here.... If Lana be asleep at this moment I do not know.... She tells me I have broke her heart--but yet will have none of me.... Tells me my duty lies elsewhere; that I shall make amends. How can a man make amends when his heart lies not in the deed?... Am I then to be fettered to a pa.s.sing whim for all eternity?
Does an instant's idle folly entail endless responsibility? Do I merit punishment everlasting for a silly amourette that lasted no longer than the July moon? Tell me, Loskiel, you who are called among us blameless and unstained, is there no hope for a guilty man to shrive himself and walk henceforward upright?”
”I can not answer you,” I said dully. ”Nor do I know how, of such a business, a man may be shriven, or what should be his amends.... It all seems pitiful and sad to me--a matter perplexing, unhappy, and far beyond my solving.... I know it is the fas.h.i.+on of the times to regard such affairs lightly, making of them nothing.... Much I have heard, little learned, save that the old lessons seem to be the truest; the old laws the best. And that our cynical and modern disregard of them make one's salvation none the surer, one's happiness none the safer.”
I heard Boyd sigh heavily, where he lay; but he said nothing more that I heard; for I slept soon afterward, and was awakened only at dawn.
Everywhere in the rocky pa.s.s the yawning riflemen were falling in and calling off; a detail of surly Jersey men, carrying ropes, pa.s.sed us, cursing the artillery which, it appeared, was in a sorry plight again, the nine guns all stalled behind us, and an entire New Jersey brigade detailed to pull them out o' the mud and over the rocks of the narrowing defile.
Boyd shared my breakfast, seeming to have recovered something of his old-time spirits. And if the camp that night had gossiped concerning what took place at Tioga Fort, it seemed to make no difference to his friends, who one and all greeted him with the same fellows.h.i.+p and affection that he had ever inspired among fighting men. No man, I think, was more beloved and admired in this Western army, by officers and men alike; for in him were naturally combined all those brilliant qualities of daring, fearlessness, and gaiety in the face of peril, which endear, and which men strive to emulate. In no enterprise had he ever failed to perform the part allotted him; never had he faltered in the hundred battles fought by Morgan's veteran corps; never had he seemed dismayed. And if sometimes he did a little more than he was asked to do, his superior officers forgave this handsome, impetuous young man--the more readily, perhaps, because, so far, no disaster had befallen when he exceeded the orders given him.
My Indians had eaten, and were touching up their paint when Major Parr came up, wearing a magnificent new suit of fringed buckskins, and ordered us to guide the rifle battalion. A moment later our conch-horn boomed out its thrilling and melodious warning. Far in the rear I heard the drums and bugle-horns of the light infantry sounding the general.
As we went forward in the early daylight, the nature of the ambuscade prepared for us became very plain to me; and I pointed out to Major Parr where the unseen enemy rested, his right flank protected by the river, his left extending north along the hog-bank, so that his lines enveloped the trail on which we marched, threatening our entire army in a most cunning and evil manner. Truly there was no fox like Butler in the Northland!
All was very still about us as we marched; the river mist hung along the woods; a few birds sang; the tops of the Indian corn rustled.