Vol 1 Chapter 1 (1/2)
Chapter 1 - Amakusa Kanade's Bitter Daily Life
Part 1
What does a person do if an erotic book falls by the roadside?
The natural thing would always be to take a glancing look.
If the person is a high school student, there is the problem of appearances. He cannot instantly pick it up, but he can go all-out in taking peeks.
If the exposed pages are a little manic, then there will be a rise in the tension.
However, such small happiness is often crushed.
[CHOOSE: ① Press it up against your face and smell it ② Eat it]
Right now, these choices appear in my head, and I must choose one choice or the other. It's always that way.
Erotic books are commonly read to get excited. If you're excited to smell or eat them, then you are the type who would already be excited that way.
However, I... smelt it.
I wasn't excited at all. That's natural. After all, being so close to it, I could only see skin color with no detail whatsoever.
”Woooow, look at that guy.”
”Smelling the erotic book, what a pervert!”
Grade school kids pa.s.sing by pointed and yelled at me.
”EroSmeller is looking this way.”
”Haha, that guy is absolutely a virgin. Vir-gin!”
They ran off, laughing.
”...What am I doing so early in the morning?”
When it was satisfied, I quietly placed the erotic book back down on the roadside.
『Absolute Choice』
The phenomenon is, as the name I gave it suggests, one where I absolutely have to choose one choice or the other. It creates a choice made of neither spoken nor written letters in my head.
Information is transmitted from an unknown source directly into my brain, which instantly comprehends it.
It ignores all five senses; even if I close my eyes or block my ears, it will not disappear until a choice is made.
”Oh, Kanade-chan.”
Abruptly, a deep voice came from in front of me.
”Geh...”
When I looked up, there she stood. Gondou Daigo (49), a housewife living nearby whose weight exceeds three digits[1]. Seeing her body was like taking a punch to the gut.
”Kanade-chan, are you on your way to school now?”
”Ye-yes, that's right.”
Daiko-san, who appeared to be returning from the convenience store, glued her eyes to me when I stepped into her view.
”Nufufu, you are as cute as ever.”
”...!”
Chills ran down my spine.
Every time we meet, this person is weirdly happy to see me.
Apparently, I look exactly like her ex-husband when he was young. What kind of useless miracle is that?
Due to a reason like that, every day my virtue is in danger. Using school as an excuse, I attempted to left quickly.
”Th-thank you, but I'm running late.”
[CHOOSE: ① ”Please hold me.” ② ”Please hold me and go with your instincts!”]
...Are you serious?
The choices sometimes require words, not just actions, and no matter how unreasonable, the choices appear and must be followed absolutely.
Even if it says ① and ②, how are they different?
”...Please hold me.”
I whispered the words in a low voice, as if I was trying to disappear. At the same time, a predatory light shone in Daiko-san's eyes, like a beast locking onto its prey.
”Kanade-chan... Finally.”
This is getting way too dangerous!
”Wa-wait a moment, I just- Nooooo!”
”I accept, thanks![2]”
What is happening?!
The lump of meat dashed madly at me, and I was hugged with all her might.
”Gyaaa!”
She's too strong! Even my bones are breaking[3]! I have to say something before it's too late!
”Give in... I give in!”
My scream was totally ignored.
”Gyaaaaaa!”
”Fuu, thank you for the feast.”
After many seconds pa.s.sed, Daiko-san was satisfied(?), let me go, and laughed as she walked away with heavy lumbering footsteps.
”Gu...”
I braced my wobbling knees and barely prevented myself from sinking down.
The time between absolute choices is completely random. It's not unusual to have them consecutively, but the combo of the erotic book and Daiko was too severe.
Feeling tired, I began to walk. As I approached the crossroads...
[CHOOSE: ① A beautiful girl falls from the sky ② Daiko-san falls from the sky ]
...No no no.
Daiko-san just walked towards her house moments ago... how is that possible? I know all too well, though, that Absolute Choice doesn't accept the laws of physics.
Once a choice states it, no matter how unscientific it may be, it will happen without fail if you choose it.
That is to say, if I chose ②, the probability of Daiko-san falling from the sky would be 100%. If I was to be hit by her... I'd die. Body and soul.
By eliminating that, it left me wondering at the wording of ①.
”What would happen then?”
Surely, a person would appear in the air? I looked up at the sky fearfully. Nothing was happening.
”?”
While I wondered and looked down in front of me for a moment...
”Dowaaaa!”
Something was falling at blistering speed before my eyes and slammed into the ground.
”Nnn... Auuu...”
I was at a loss for words. Even though I had been somewhat mentally prepared... Something seriously fell.
But in the next moment, besides the idea of something falling, an intense question appeared in my brain.
”What... Is this?”
Because the person(?) was doing a human bridge position.
Disagreeable as it is, there's no other way to describe it... The person(?) who fell... was definitely doing a human bridge position.
Not facing downwards, or facing up; instead, it did a splendid bridge.
...Why?
It was too surreal a spectacle; I was frozen in place.
I froze for a dozen seconds. The living bridge suddenly collapsed.
Because of that, I returned to my senses. It pushed the mental impact of seeing a human bridge land and reminded me that a person fell from the sky.
”A-are you okay?!”
I was near panicking and was frantically shaking the body.
”Nnn... Fumiyu?[4]”
As though she was waking up, a weird sound escaped from her.
”Go-good...”
She was alive. My chest heaved a sigh of relief as she looked up.
”Ah? Here... where am I?”
She restlessly scanned the vicinity until settling on me.
”Um...”
She was breathtaking. Skin so white she was almost like a ghost, soft, fluffy blond hair, and clear, round blue eyes. She wore chocolate colored fairy-tale like clothing.
And above all, a figure too buxom for a non-white[5]. Her whole appearance was too surreal, and I couldn't help but be stunned.
Unlike me who couldn't find any words, her face suddenly brightened.
”Amakusa Kanade-san, right?”
”Eh?”
I was bewildered by her suddenly saying my full name.
”Ah... yeah, that's right.”
I searched my memories, but I can't find anything regarding this beautiful girl in my brain.
”Err... you are?”
”Yes, my name is... Ah? My name is... Hmm... what was it?”
”No, I don't know...”
The girl looked like she was thinking a moment, then clapped her hands suddenly.
”I understand! I have lost some memories, like amnesia.”
No, you really shouldn't say that so s.p.u.n.kily.
”When I fell, I likely received a strong shock to the head.”
No, you did that beautiful bridge and your head didn't touch the ground.
”Oh well, I'll remember before too long. I'm the Heizamon of calmness.”
Heizaemon of calm[6]... No one uses that expression these days, especially an openly foreign girl... Saying that was extremely incongruous.
”Ah... For now it would be good to call me Heizaemon.”
I'll pa.s.s.
”Now, putting aside the name issue. Lets have an important talk, Kanade-san.”
”Important?...”
She stepped close to my side with a defenseless smile, and I suddenly felt strange.
What is it? The sense of deja-vu was strong.
”Please? Kanade-san?”
I got it... It reminded me of a dog.
It arbitrarily comes to your hand with unconditional trust and goodwill. This girl and a dog give off the same vibe.
By reflex, I petted her head.
Was this appropriate? Although I thought that, her face gave out a joyful expression that was far from hating it.
”Hehehe.”
”Hmm?”
Part of her forelock stiffened and raised up unnaturally. When I stopped stroking her head, it returned to its original shape.
”Ah, when I'm happy it stands freely.”
A tail... She's a dog after all.
Suddenly, a desire appeared. Inexplicably, I stretched out my hand to her.
”Hand.”
”Yes!”
She held hers out.
”Sit.”
”Yes!”
She did it. She's perfectly like a dog.
”Gugyuuuuuuu.”
Then suddenly, a terrible sound echoed. For a moment it sounded the cry of a voice actor, but apparently it was this girl's stomach rumbling.
”Ah, I'm hungry.[7]”
It was a grotesque image.
”You're really that hungry?... Ah, I might have something.”
Remembering something, I reached into my bag and groped around.
I pulled out a small chocolate bar. The moment it appeared, her face lit up.
”Ah, its chocolate!”
”Do you like this?”
”I love it!”
Her smile covered all of her face. It's forbidden to give chocolate to a real dog, but this girl was only dog-like. She was still human... right?
”Yes.”
I undid the wrapping and threw it lightly in the air. She hopped to where it was falling and caught it with her mouth in mid-air.
”Delis.h.!.+[8]”
Seemingly blessed, her face smiled happily. Like earlier, her forelock rose like a tail. It stood straight up... How strange.
”Ah, let's go with that.”
She finished the chocolate and clapped her hands.
”What was that?”
”It's Chocolate.”
”Ah, what?”
”That's my name.”
”No... I don't understand what you mean.”
”Kanade-san, do you like chocolate?”
”Hmm, I guess so. To the extent of putting some in my bag... I like sweet things in general.”
”Then, my name is Chocolate.”
What a simplistic way of thinking.
”No, Chocolate isn't chocolate.”
”Ah, I'm not? Then... How about a French sounding Chocolat.[9]”
I don't know which side of being intelligent she's on but when I think of Chocolat I think of a dog. The provisional name stuck though.
”Yes, it is decided!”
Ah, if she's convinced, it's likely good to go with it.
It's only a part of her memory that's lost. If she hears many things maybe she will remember her name. Chocolat(?)... First of all, in order to determine how much memory she had, I asked her purpose.
”It is to take care of Kanade-san.”
With no hesitation she declared that.
”Ah? Caring... for me?”
”Yes. Though my other memories aren't clear, that is completely certain.”
Somehow, the situation has become weirder.
”I-is that so?... Then, your home; where are you from?
”There!”
She pointed above her head.
”Ah? From the north?”
Judging by appearance, she definitely wasn't Asian... Did she mean Russia, or even Northern Europe?
”No, above the sky.[10]”
”Above... the sky?”
”That's right!”
No... though she did fall from the sky.
”In short, in order to take care of me you came from a world in the sky?”
”Just like that.”
Chocolat took a guts pose[11] with a huge smile on her face. In contrast, I felt chills in my heart.
”Goodbye!”
”W-why are you leaving? Please wait!”
I don't like doing it, but... It is all very dubious.
”I'll absolutely benefit you if you let me try staying with you!”
Why did Chocolat run after me while rubbing her hands together?
”No, things suit me fine now.”
”Right now, I come with detergent.”
”No. You are not a newspaper.”
”I also come with watermelon and tempura.”
”That sounds like it'll give a stomachache!”
”With an apple and a gorilla!”
”I don't need them or a trumpet and panties!”
”Marriage and a letter of divorce are included!”
”Those absolutely shouldn't go together.”
”I also come with a plot of land and the deed.”
”I need that!”
”Sorry, that's a lie.”
”Tell the truth!”
”『Guri and Gura』[12] also come with me.”
”I have it. Don't make fun of a masterpiece!”
”Baka and Test also come with me.”
”Things like that aren't sufficient! If that's the case, it's a failure, right?!”
”Then, buy this suspicious jar. Sign here.”
”Trying to make a sale in a moment of confusion!...”
...Ku, who on earth is this person.
It's better not to get involved with her. I decided that and turned to walk away.
”Aaa!”
Behind me, a horrible fake voice rang out. I ignored it and continued on.
”Aaaaa!”
It was likely to keep going if I didn't react. Reluctantly, I turned around. Chocolat was coquettishly lying on the ground while looking up at me.
A handkerchief from somewhere was stuffed in her mouth as a prop... To think that such an irritating person had showed up.
”Later.”
”Wait a moment, a weak girl has fallen down! You should be solicitously asking 『Are you okay, Baby?』”
Such lines are only permitted to Hanawa-kun[13]!
”You see, I have to be at school, so I don't have spare time to bother with you.”
I've become more rude and less friendly with her[14]. My brain must have judged that I don't need to respect this creature.
”It's okay! I'll listen to anything, so more, please!”
”Then, don't pay attention to me.”
”Oh, I'm sorry. You have asked for a wish my power is not sufficient to fulfill.”
Are you Shenron?![15]
Troubling... What should I do to shake off this strange creature?
While I was thinking about that, a certain thing caught my eye...
”Chocolat-san, Chocolat-san.”
”Yes, what is it?”
I took the remainder out of the bag.
”Ah, it's chocolate! Can I have it?”
”Yes.”
I dangled the chocolate from my hand in front of her.
”Please give it to me!”
Even though Chocolat was hopping up and down, she was relatively short and couldn't reach it. While holding it high, I measured the timing.
It's good; the timing is just right. I'm sad to be wasting food, but...
”Here!”
As it pa.s.sed, I threw the chocolate into the back of a pickup.
”Ah, wait please, chocolate!”
Chocolat ran with light steps after the pickup.
I watched the gap between them increase until they went around the corner, disappearing from my sight without her giving up.
”Seriously...”
Even with a long wait, there was no sign of her returning. Even though I thought she was an idiot, I didn't think she'd be tricked that perfectly.
Golden Week was starting, the time when the calendar just reaches the summer and the weather turns warm, while a spring-like atmosphere still strongly remains.
”Oh well... I'll be careful about that strange person.”
I faced towards the school and began to walk.
Part 2
Our high school, Seikou Private School, is proud of its 15 first year cla.s.ses. It is a mammothly large school and has a wastefully large ground area.
To put it simply, it's a moderately long distance from the front gate to the school doors.
Sniffing the erotic book, Daiko-san's hug, and an encounter with the mysterious dog-like creature were all considerable burdens on my mental and physical stamina, and they left me feeling sick as I crossed the schoolyard.
After a few minutes I finally reached the entrance deep in the grounds. Fortunately, Cla.s.s 1 of the second year is at this end of the 2nd floor. I just had to go up the stairs and I would be at my cla.s.s.
”Morning.”
I opened the door and exchanged greetings with the friends I could see.
On my way to my seat, I ran into a girl standing still by the window: Yukihira Furano.
She stood there very casually. However, she still gave off a strange sense of presence. Only around Yukihira did the air seem strained.
As if embodying the image of the name[16], her white hair in the sunlight streaming from the window gave off a bright light, like the reflection off newly fallen snow.
”Hey, morning, Yukihira.”
In response to my voice, she turned around. Though there was an artificial feel to her features, they were very refined.
Without an expression Yukihira replied.
”Morning, maggot[17] jerk.”
”...Huh?”
Surprisingly abusive language was used.
Normally you'd think you had misheard, but with Yukihira, anything's possible.
It's not a conversation if you flinch and back away, though.
”Ah, the weather is nice today.”
”Yes it is, maggot jerk.”
”On a day like today, I'd like to skip school and go play somewhere.”
”You are surprisingly naughty, maggot jerk.”
”What day of the week is it today?”
”Monday. Does that please you, maggot jerk?”
”Don't you know I'm trying to change your topic?!”
In contrast to my raised voice, Yukihira's is serene.
”Oh, sorry if it made you feel bad. It's just a little bug joke.”
”Bug... joke? What on earth is that?”
It's the first time I've ever heard that in my life.
”This morning, on the fortune-telling segment on TV, it said there might be an insect related disaster. Even if I'm not that serious in believing it, I do still worry a bit.”
”Yes, and?”
”Then, I thought I'd make some jokes and we could laugh it off.”
”That's too much of a reversal...”
”Hey, I don't settle for succ.u.mbing to fate because I'm a woman with a rebellious spirit. I'll fight it to the death if it's not something I can accept.”
”No... Don't think it will be that big of an event.”
”By the way, Amakusa, if you want I'll do more insect jokes.”
”No, you've done enough.”
”By the way, Amakusa, if you want I'll do more insect jokes.”
It seems you want me to hear them. Even if I bluntly refuse, it will just prolong things.
”Then, tell me one.”
”...”
”Yukihira?”
”...”
”h.e.l.lo, Yukihira-san?”
”Hey, listen, Monsieur. Today, a stupid cla.s.smate was ignored[18] for you.”
It was endlessly trivial.
”By the way, just now I didn't only use 'insect' and 'ignore', did you also see me play off the word Monsieur?[19]”
”...I don't get it.”
Explaining a gag that didn't work... Such a strong personality.
”Then George, who was deprived of a turn for this; where should he put his anger?!”
”Who is that?!”
This Yukihira Furano... Though she should be a cool person, she jokes around in a way that raises the tension. She just can't be a normal character.
”Roughly what are you thinking about, Amakusa? You have the face of someone about to go attack a little girl at any moment.”
”What the h.e.l.l kind of face is thaaaat?!”
”Or, the the face of villager at the entrance of the village endlessly repeating 『The Starting Village』.”
”No, there is nothing in common with those two pieces...”
”Or, the the face of villager at the entrance of the village who is endlessly repeating 『Huh... Huh... You want to look at little girls?』.”
”Don't force the two together!”
...It's useless. You can only get exhausted dealing with someone like her. I abandoned the conversation and started to go around her...
[CHOOSE ① ”Hey, your b.r.e.a.s.t.s[20], let me touch your b.r.e.a.s.t.s” ② ”Hey, my b.r.e.a.s.t.s, touch my b.r.e.a.s.t.s.”]
...Yeah, this is strange. This is strange, right?
People usually would resist such a choice at any price if compelled. At the start I also resisted... at the start. When Absolute Choice first appeared, I tried to avoid picking either choice... As a result, excruciating pain strikes your brain. I can't do it anymore.
I'm not joking. At first the pain is only faint and dull, but over time it feels like my head is being slowly crushed by a steamroller. The skull begins to fracture and the fluid in my brain starts leaking; how else can I describe it? Even the woman with a scar on her face wouldn't be able to deal with it.
In other words, resistance is useless, impossible, and a waste of effort.
A man takes a breath. Dogs can't speak languages. And when an Absolute Choice appears, a choice is naturally chosen.
With that being said...
”Hey, my b.r.e.a.s.t.s, touch my b.r.e.a.s.t.s.”
The moment I said those lines, Yukihira's eyebrows moved slightly.
”...Amakusa... You, just now, what?!”
It's no wonder you'd ask that. It's a remark that anyone can hardly believe they heard right.
”No, that is-”
”Perhaps, you just asked me to touch your t.i.ts[21]?”
”...Huh? Just now, what?”
I instinctively asked back, just now... Did she say t.i.ts?”
”I would like to hear whether you said 『Please touch my t.i.ts』 or not.”
”No... I said something similar, except I didn't say t.i.ts.”
”t.i.ts weren't mentioned? It's funny; I'm sure I heard the word t.i.ts. t.i.ts is a word that I'm absolutely sure I didn't hear wrongly... Ah, is it shameful to have said t.i.ts and now you are trying to conceal it? Even though I don't think t.i.ts is a vulgar word. Starting with t.i.ts is...”
”You only want me to say t.i.ts!”
”I admit it. But even you want to call out t.i.ts so badly sometimes.”
”I agree.”
”That's not a reason!”
”I'm getting scolded suddenly?!”
...At times like those Yukihira, the weirdo, was good to have around. If this choice had appeared in front of other women, it would be a big problem.
Actually, last year's cla.s.s was disastrous. In front of the girls many things were done and said that can't be told... No, I won't remember it because I'll want to cry.
Anyway, this Absolute Choice seems pleased to make me have the worst experiences.
In terms of a galge, only the paths to bad endings were chosen last year. I wasn't even able to taste the L of Love.
I don't want to be popular, I just want to talk to women (without frightening them or being despised by them)...
Today, however, there are a lot more Absolute Choices, and the choices are nastier. I went to my seat quickly; it's better to be quiet.
As I tried to pa.s.s quickly by Yukihira's side...
[CHOOSE ①”Hey, your t.i.ts, let me touch your t.i.ts.” ②”Hey, my t.i.ts, touch my t.i.ts.”]
...I don't need this. I tried to go with the flow, but this is absolutely unnecessary.
However, no matter how much I complain in my heart, I have no veto power.
”Hey, my t.i.ts, touch my t.i.ts.”
Yukihira, who took that expressionlessly, opened her mouth.
”I'm sorry. I don't want to talk to people who say such vulgar things.”
”Which mouth is saying that?!”
”This mouth. This mouth always says t.i.ts.”
”Is the word consistency not in your dictionary?!”
”In my dictionary, only the word t.i.ts appears.”
”Then all your life you have been calling them t.i.ts!”
”Amakusa, you... Are you really taking a joke like that seriously?”
”Gaaaaah!”
I crumpled and tore at my hair. It's useless... I can't deal with her. I've been playing the fool with Yukihira... I shook it off, turned the other way, and headed to my seat.
Even though homeroom hadn't started, I was already absurdly fatigued.
With a sigh, I sat down and casually glanced out the window.
”...Eh?”
In the middle of the second-story window, a face appeared.
”Waaah!”
I stood from my chair by reflex.
”Oh, Amacchi. Morning!”
The person on the other side of the gla.s.s gave a smile and flung open the window.
”Toe!”
The person dove feet-first through the window frame while giving off an action-hero-like cry.
While trailing elegant black hair that reached to her waist, she landed lightly.
”You... Where did you come from?”
The girl who received all the cla.s.ses' attention, Yuuouji Ouka[22], stuck her thumb up and declared:
”Ha, because the guidance counselors were at the entrance I climbed up the wall!”
If you consider it... It's not a large climb, and you wouldn't have too bad of a fall, but even if it happens to cross your mind you usually wouldn't do it.
I stared at the girl intently. Long, glossy black hair. Full-bodied in the right places, but slender on the whole. The gentle features and appearance of a girl brought up by a fine family.
However, once she opens her mouth, she's noisy like a grade-schooler, her face flickers through expressions rapidly, and she repeatedly does unpredictable things.
Climbing the wall of a school would usually be called an impossible act, but in Yuuouji's case, it's completed with a single thought.
”Hi, Amacchi. Your face is looking tired; something wrong?”
Without hesitation, she brought her face too close.
”Uuu...”
We're already young men and women... I wish she was aware of that, but it's impossible for her.
”No, there were various things this morning... Rather, what's with the backpack?”
On Yuuouji's back was a swollen-to-the-limit-rucksack.
”Where the heck did that come from...”
”Listen closely. Nahaha, because I wanted to smuggle this, I wasn't able to come in through the front entrance.”
I waited as Yuuouji happily lowered the rucksack to the floor.
She carried that up the wall... What kind of superhuman strength is that...?
”Look, look; these are our prototypes.”
The contents were casually dumped on the floor.
Most of the items are stamped with the 『UOG』 logo.
Though it's hard to believe, Yuuouji is the daughter of the president of UOG, a very big and well-known company.
Their business is food, clothing, cosmetics, consumer electronics, books, etc. They produce practically everything, and it's hard to find a house that doesn't have a UOG product in it. It's a company closely tied into people's lives.
”These were rejected in the planning stage of our product development section. For now they're being set aside, but we still want the opinions of kids for future reference.”
Yuuouji's voice tempted our cla.s.smates to gather around her.
Even if they were products that were killed, they were on the leading edge in UOG fas.h.i.+on, and so being interested in them was natural.
”Ouka-chan, what is that?”
Everyone could take a product and submit his or her opinion. One girl pointed at a dangerously red-colored bottle.
”Oh, that... That's for wives who are faced with ennui. It's an aphrodisiac for women. It appears to activate women's s.e.x hormones.”
Who would ask high school students' opinions of thaaaaat?!
”The effect is outstanding and the price is cheap, but no questions were asked in the planning meeting,. It was just dropped.”
”Hmm, why would that be?”