Part 18 (1/2)

”Take hereditary causes and surrounding circ.u.mstances, for instance. In order to understand or judge a man right, you would need to live under the same roof with him from childhood, and under the same roofs, or tents, with his parents, right back to Adam, and then you'd be blocked for want of more ancestors through which to trace the causes that led to Abel--I mean Cain--going on as he did. What's the use or sense of it?

You might argue away in any direction for a million miles and a million years back into the past, but you've got to come back to where you are if you wish to do any good for yourself, or anyone else.

”Sometimes it takes you a long while to get back to where you are--sometimes you never do it. Why, when those controversies were started in the 'Bulletin' about the kangaroos and other things, I thought I knew something about the bush. Now I'm d.a.m.ned if I'm sure I could tell a kangaroo from a wombat.

”Trying to find out things is the cause of all the work and trouble in this world. It was Eve's fault in the first place--or Adam's, rather, because it might be argued that he should have been master. Some men are too lazy to be masters in their own homes, and run the show properly; some are too careless, and some too drunk most of their time, and some too weak. If Adam and Eve hadn't tried to find out things there'd have been no toil and trouble in the world to-day; there'd have been no bloated capitalists, and no h.o.r.n.y-handed working men, and no politics, no freetrade and protection--and no clothes. The woman next door wouldn't be able to pick holes in your wife's was.h.i.+ng on the line. We'd have been all running about in a big Garden of Eden with nothing on, and nothing to do except loaf, and make love, and lark, and laugh, and play practical jokes on each other.”

Joe grinned.

”That would have been glorious. Wouldn't it, Joe? There'd have been no 's.e.x problem' then.”

The Master's Mistake

William Spencer stayed away from school that hot day, and ”went swimming”. The master wrote a note to William's father, and gave it to William's brother Joe to carry home.

”You'll give that to your father to-night, Joseph.”

”Yes, sir.”

Bill waited for Joe near the gap, and walked home with him.

”I s'pose you've got a note for father.”

”Yes,” said Joe.

”I s'pose you know what's in it?”

”Ye--yes. Oh, why did you stop away, Bill?”

”You don't mean to say that you're dirty mean enough to give it to father? Hey?”

”I must, Will. I promised the master.”

”He needn't never know.”

”Oh, yes, he will. He's coming over to our place on Sat.u.r.day, and he's sure to ask me to-morrow.”

Pause.

”Look here, Joe!” said Bill, ”I don't want to get a hiding and go without supper to-night. I promised to go 'possuming with Johnny Nowlett, and he's going to give me a fire out of his gun. You can come, too. I don't want to cop out on it to-night--if I do I'll run away from home again, so there.”

Bill walked on a bit in moody, Joe in troubled, silence.

Bill tried again: he threatened, argued, and pleaded, but Joe was firm.

”The master trusted me, Will,” he said.