C240 (1/2)

Zhang Shiyan did nothing, he quietly pulled a chair to sit down, across a distance of dozens of centimeters, silent looking at the people on the hospital bed.

Before looking at her, he didn't hold her warm like he did not keep her warm.

He couldn't tell what he was feeling now.

When she gave all her feelings and gave her everything she could give her, she still loved that person, even called the name of that person in her dreams, frowned for that person, and shed tears from the corners of her eyes. No one stipulates that if a man likes a woman, he should smile and bear all the grievances and pains. When he is too miserable in his heart, he has to squeeze out a few smiles and care for his beloved woman. He loves Ji Nansheng, but it is because of his deep love that he will inevitably feel a bit bitter and sad when he finds that he may receive less than half of his love all his life.

Looking at Ji Nansheng struggling in the nightmare, Zhang Shiyan couldn't help asking herself: is it really right to force her to be with me like this?

As she said at that time, she may never give him the same love, she may always hide another man in her heart, he will guard such a her life, really can always do without regret, really can not blame her at all?

There was a strange resentment in his heart now. After she was kidnapped, when he learned that he had lost their child, she was thinking of someone else. He had a bit of self mockery in his heart. How long did he start to blame her? If she had been guarding her for 30 or 60 years, they would always be a good couple instead of a bitter couple as he imagined?

”I feel like It's not as great as I thought. ”

Zhang Shiyan withdrew his eyes and stopped looking at Ji Nansheng. He lowered his head and looked at the crooked curve in his palm and laughed bitterly. A Sheng, when you leave me, I can wait for you without complaint or regret, because you are not by my side, I will not personally feel the pain of watching you care about others. That kind of waiting is just a simple waiting. As long as I insist on a goal and believe that you will come back, I can stick to it day by day.

But when you come back, it all changes. Looking at your smile every day, your words and deeds, my heart can not help but produce greed, delusion, want to occupy your heart, your soul, your whole attention. When I see you secretly miss others behind my back, I will be angry and I will be sad; when I see that no matter how good I am to you, you still refuse to accept it, I will feel tired and feel that such a day is meaningless

I thought that when you came back, I would be more motivated to continue to love you to death. It turns out that I think highly of myself. If you don't come back, I can persist, but when you come back, I can't hold on to it, asheng

Zhang Shiyan cast aside his feelings in his heart, and then looked up at Ji Nansheng again.

She was still haunted by nightmares and couldn't wake up.

He didn't want to pass at this time, but looking at the sweat and frown on her forehead, he couldn't help trying to smooth her tight frown. He sighed, got up and sat on the edge of the bed and gently held her fingers.

”A Sheng --”

”a Sheng, wake up.”

”Dear, it's all dreams. Don't be afraid, just wake up.”

Zhang Shiyan bent down, stuck to Ji Nansheng's ear, called her name gently, and spoke to her gently, trying to dispel her nightmare and save her from the endless nightmare.

Ji Nansheng saw Qin Jingyuan gradually away from himself in his nightmare. His body became more and more blurred like fog. However, his body did not disappear because of her cry.

All of a sudden, a golden sun sprinkled into the dark dream. She looked up vaguely. The sunlight was directly down from the sky, illuminating the darkness on the ground.

When she was unprepared, the warm sunshine surrounded her and dispelled the cold bad breath.

She subconsciously looked at the direction of Qin Jingyuan, that slightly transparent figure, at the moment of the sun appeared, like other people's broken glass, the whole broken, leaving only a fragment of the ground.

She watched the man disappear in front of her and suddenly woke up in grief.