Part 20 (1/2)
After helping her out of the truck, Jackson pulled the hood of Hannah's windbreaker over her head, his fingers lingering on her face. ”It's still misting a little. Are you sure you're up for a walk on the beach?”
Trying to ignore her tingling skin, she burrowed her hands in her pockets. ”Walking on the beach is a good idea any time. Too bad we didn't bring a kite. It's windy enough to fly one.”
He sent her a sideways glance. ”You can't fly a kite in the rain. Are you trying to find out if I still have the one from my b.l.o.o.d.y nose adventure?”
Hannah laughed. ”You'll have to figure that out for yourself.”
He guided her to the path leading to the sh.o.r.e. ”I have yet to figure out any woman. Even our four-year-old is a mystery to me. Which way?”
She pointed to the right. ”So, did you? Keep the kite, I mean?”
”I wasn't going to get rid of something you touched.”
She slid her arm through his. ”You're a hopeless romantic.”
”It gets worse. I also have the home run ball.”
”No wonder I couldn't find it.”
Jackson abruptly stopped walking. ”What do you mean you couldn't find it?”
”I went back a few days later looking for it.”
He smiled widely. ”Did you just hear yourself? You remembered something from your childhood.”
”Random things like that will pop into my head, but I can't always tie them to anything. You mentioned me hitting the home run the other night, but it wasn't until today when you said it again that I remembered.”
”This is very encouraging.”
Hannah sat down and patted the area next to her. When he raised his eyebrows, she said, ”Are you afraid of a little wet sand?”
”Not at all.” He took his place beside her.
”Are there any other souvenirs from our past lurking around in your closet?”
”Nope. You know all my secrets.”
She looked at the water. ”I wish I knew my own. Do you think Mitch.e.l.l will come again?”
”I'd be surprised if he doesn't.”
”Then I wish he'd do it so we can get it over with and move on.”
”It won't do much good if he comes before you've figured out everything.”
Hannah sifted sand from one hand to the other. ”I don't need to remember to know I don't want to be with him.”
”Yes, you do, Hannah.”
”Are you saying our relations.h.i.+p is dependent on me remembering Mitch.e.l.l?”
”I'm saying that we can't make decisions if we don't have all the facts.”
”You're not going to let yourself get close to me, are you? You think I'll leave again.”
”Neither of us knows what brought you here or what your plans were.”
”I'm not going back to him, Jackson.”
He stretched out and put his hands behind his head. ”What are you basing that on? It's not as if you know me any better than you know him.”
Hannah leaned over him. ”How can you say that? Of course I know you better than him. I may have lost my memory, but I haven't lost the ability to observe and draw conclusions. My present knowledge of you is limited, but it's enough for me to know that you're someone I could be happy with.”
The wind blew her hair across his face. He inhaled its scent and twirled one of the long strands around his finger. ”I'm not doubting you, Hannah, but given our unusual circ.u.mstances, it's only prudent to move slowly.”
”Then that's what we'll do.”
Jackson closed his eyes. ”Would you like to go out to dinner tonight?”
”That would be fun.”
He felt her fingers moving through his damp hair. Her touch was light, but it sent tiny s.h.i.+vers down his spine. ”That feels nice,” he murmured. Leaving his hair, she caressed the side of his face. Jackson's pulse started to race as his entire body seemed to come alive. When she reached his lips, he opened his eyes and caught her hand.
”I thought you were asleep,” she admitted.
”I'd have to be very tired to sleep in these conditions.”
”Do you want me to stop?”
His eyes reflected both pa.s.sion and torment. ”No, but you probably should.”
Hannah leaned down and kissed his cheek. ”Another time then.”
Jackson didn't trust himself to speak. His self-control was hanging on by the thinnest of threads. The desires that had long been dormant inside him had come to life with an ease that left him shaken. He was allowing himself to get caught up in a situation that was founded on nothing of substance. This time with Hannah was similar to an illusion that could shatter at the first touch of reality. Forcing a smile to his lips, he stood up and pulled her to her feet. ”We should be getting back.”
Hannah sighed inwardly as they retraced their steps to the truck. Jackson hadn't said a word in the last ten minutes. The scars she had to worry about weren't the visible ones. His love for her wasn't in doubt, but it was obvious from his reaction that he didn't trust her. He had drawn a line in the sand that he wasn't going to cross.
In no way did she blame him for doubting her motives. She hadn't valued his love when he offered it and hadn't deemed it important enough to alter her own plans. Such duplicity couldn't be easily forgiven and made any kind of resolution difficult. Jackson didn't settle for less, no matter what the cost to himself. He didn't lower his standards to get what he wanted. Until the past was resolved and perhaps not even then things would remain as they were between them.
Her glance left the blue water and met the blueness of his eyes. The insecurity she saw there was her doing, and it would have to be her actions that took it away. She couldn't force her memories to return, but hopefully she could find a way to show him that his heart was finally safe with her.
Jackson took her to a family-owned Italian restaurant located on the water. Sitting across from him at their candlelit table, she felt a stirring of recognition.
”Have we been here before?”
He looked up from the menu. ”Yes, many times.”