Part 17 (1/2)
”I give you my unconditional love”
Precious words! A quarter-century elapsed before I had another auricular proof of his love His lips were strange to ardor; silence becaive azed at me with childlike trust
”I will love you eternally, Gurudeva!”
”Ordinary love is selfish, darkly rooted in desires and satisfactions
Divine love is without condition, without boundary, without change
The flux of the hu touch of pure love” He added hu from a state of God-realization, please pro me back to the Cosathering darkness and guided oes and almond sweetmeats, he unobtrusively wove into his conversation an intirandeur of his wisdom, exquisitely blended with an innate hurieve for your auru apparently had caught a reflection ofreality of your presence, Master, is joy beyond any sye, inase”
I had made no references to my life; they now seemed superfluous!
By his natural, unemphatic manner, I understood that he wished no astonished ejaculations at his clairvoyance
”You should go back to Calcutta Why exclude relatives froestion dish I had been unresponsive tobird fly in the s will tire in the heavy atmosphere We shall yet see him swoop toward home, fold his pinions, and hu si” in the direction of Calcutta
”Sir, I a hoive me your address, and your nae is in Sera my mother here for only a few days”
I wondered at God's intricate play with His devotees Seraions I had never caught a gli to the ancient city of Kasi (Benares), hallowed by memories of Lahiri Mahasaya Here too the feet of Buddha, Shankaracharya and other Yogi--Christs had blessed the soil
”You will come to me in four weeks” For the first time, Sri Yukteswar's voice was stern ”Now I have toldyou-that is why you disregard my request The next time we meet, you will have to reawaken my interest: I won't accept you as a disciple easily There ”
I reuru easily penetrated h at you?”
”I will not return”
”You will return in thirty days”
”Never” Bowing reverently at his feet, I departed without lightening the controversial tension As I ht darkness, I wondered why thehad ended on an inharmonious note The dual scales of MAYA, that balance every joy with a grief!
My young heart was not yet uru
The nextI noticed increased hostility in the attitude of the here members My days became spiked with invariable rudeness In three weeks, Dyananda left the ashram to attend a conference in Bombay; pandemonium broke overher this reretted for the first time that I had obeyed the request to send back ht outPlease convey rets to Dyanandaji when he returns”
”I will leave also! My attempts to meditate here meet with no more favor than your own” Jitendra spoke with determination