Volume 6 Chapter 4 (1/2)

While under the supervision of Marcho, I activated [Awakening] in order to master it.

Shortly thereafter, four black wings and a horn then emerged.

”Khh”

I let out a strange voice.

It was happening again: something fiendish was raging within me.

This had always been the case when I used Awakening.

I wanted to destroy everything, to indulge in them, and to desecrate them.

Having sensed my dark self, I tried to suppress the impulses that were rushing in. Try as I might though, I felt my consciousness fading away rapidly. As the world turned dark, the desire to rage as much as I wanted grew.

Marcho said that this is my other side but I don't want to believe that. Of course this isn't me, there's no way this is me!

”Procell, no, not like that. What you're doing is the same as before: you're forcibly suppressing those emotions. If you keep on doing that, you'll only end up being swallowed up.”

Marcho's voice felt farther and farther away.

And then, my normal self was completely gone.

Oh yes, this feels so good. I feel so refreshed. I'm finally in this form again. Now, I can do whatever the fuck I want.

This woman, this bitch in front of me is so noisy. How long does she intend to look down on me from her high horse? Enough already, you are mine and you will listen to what I say. You foolish woman, you won't learn unless I teach you with your body like I taught that little wolf-girl, will you?

”As your Demon Lord, I command you to-”

I had managed to say only that much before something hit me and sent me rolling.

What the hell happened!? This bitch, she dares to literally look down on me while I'm on the ground!? Unforgivable. Absolutely unforgivable.

”It seems [Awakening] isn't the only thing you're misunderstanding, huh. It looks like you're also gravely underestimating the dangers that monsters present.”

How dare she. I'll thoroughly teach her her place. Ahh, just imagining the look on her face as she cries and begs for forgiveness, excites me very much. First, I'll have her prostrate herself. I'll just have to be careful this time and watch my surroundings before I issue my command; I'll never let her do something like blow me away happen again. Never again.

”I command-”

However, before I could issue my command, I was blown away again.

”Geez. You're so smart and yet so careless. You've lost yourself so easily. You're already driven primarily by your instincts, aren't you? Such a troublesome child.”

Marcho bitterly smiled and sighed can't be helped.

Meanwhile, I stood up and glared at her.

How? How is she capable of humiliating me like this? I'm supposed to be the strongest Demon Lord, especially in my current form. First of all, as my monster, she shouldn't even be able to harm me. Why must I endure such violence!?

”You look confused, Procell. Shall we conduct a class? Remember, there are two rules that protect a Demon Lord from their monsters. The first is that no monster can disobey a command given by their Demon Lord. If a monster doesn't want to do something, it can freely disregard its Demon Lord's will by not letting the Demon Lord say the command to them.”

I know that. What I have no idea about is how she can blow me away. According to the next rule she's about to say, such a thing should be impossible.

”The second rule is that monsters can't harm their Demon Lords.”

”I know. Now tell me, how were you able to do that to me?”

And yet, she managed to blow me away twice. Even if she's a monster that has the powers of a Demon Lord, so long as she's my monster, she shouldn't be able to harm me.

”I haven't done anything to you though. Very well, I guess I'll tell you the trick to it. You see, hiding in my shadow is a monster. In other words, it's not me that's interrupting you but rather, it's that child.”

”Don't screw with me. Your monsters should have also been placed under my command and therefore shouldn't be able to harm me as well!”

Along with Marcho herself, I gained control of her dungeon and her monsters.

”The answer is simple: I have ended my contract with this child. So rather than that obligation, this child cares for me and follows me out of its own will. You better remember: if you treat your monsters too cruelly, be prepared for the worst. Like for example, a monster that you've forsaken may choose to call in some humans or some monsters that are not under your control in order to deal with you. Conversely, just like now, if a monster loves you, it will protect you even after you release it from your control. Being a good Demon Lord to your monsters is important.”

Her words shocked me. Thoughts like what if they let enemies into my bedroom and what if information of a trip outside of my dungeon is leaked beforehand ran through my mind.

Thinking on it, the rule of Demon Lords over monsters was indeed in no way perfect.

”You left my dungeon too soon so I did not get the chance to teach such things. I apologize for that. From now on though, rest assured, I'll be teaching you a lot of things.”

Again. She's looking down on me again. So irritating. Above all else, what I cannot forgive is treating me like a child! I'll dominate her and be the one on top. …But how? Should I create a space between us so that I can summon Kuina and the others? Or… should I just make her taste my power? The one protecting her, it's most probably one of her [Monsters of the Covenant]: the assassin that hides in the shadow. If so, then if I get rid of the shadows using a stun grenade while giving her a command, it won't be able to interrupt.

”Fuu. I thought you have become a fine man but I see now that you're still a child that's desperately trying to be treated like an adult. And then, through [Awakening], your desire of wanting me to recognize that you're no longer a child has been twisted into this. Contemplate on that for a second.”

What? No, it's not like that at all. I've become strong, stronger than everybody else. So much so that even the three supposed-to-be strongest Demon Lords can't compare to me. I have no need of being recognized by this bitch.

”Lies! And don't treat me like a child!”

”There, you said it yourself, don't treat me like a child. I'm not plastering you with lies, you know. Listen with that walled-off heart of yours and you'll know that it's true. You'll know that you have this desire of being recognized by me, to be told you're a splendid Demon Lord and whatnot.”

”It's not like-”

”It is like that. And that weakness is a part of you too.”

What is this uncomfortable feeling?

”By the way, about your ill treatment on that little girl, that Fel, that is brought on by the stress you've gained from acting like a kind father to your monsters. I mean, you're surrounded by these fascinating and beautiful girls but you say to yourself that you have to restrain yourself because you're their father. In other words, your feelings as a father is conflicting with your instincts as a man. …you may have set a line you promised yourself you will never cross but all that pent-up emotions finally proved too much and so you went too far with that little girl.”

She's probably talking about what I did with Fel. But that was what she herself wanted.

”Well, I'd say it can't be helped. You may do it with me if you'd like but if you want to be discreet, you can also visit a brothel. Restraining yourself too much is also not good, you hear? Or else something like that will happen again.”

Marcho spoke gently. In response though, I got embarrassed.

Do it with her? Go to a brothel?

”That's none of your business!”

Such words involuntarily came out of my mouth. As I said such words though, I felt various colors return to my oddly cold and black heart.

”Ah! You were more like your usual self just now, weren't you? I guess I'm on the right track then.”

My heart began to go into an uproar, various colors were mixing with another.

I was unable to refute her words and wondered if I did look at Kuina and the others not as my daughters but as members of the opposite sex. After some thought, I recalled that I did indeed felt charmed by their feminine appeals. However, because I was their father, I continually shoved those emotions away.

”Don't get me wrong, I'm not judging you or anything. After all, we may treat them as our children but they're not actually our children. You can't help it if you find a member of the opposite sex attractive. Your love as a father is real and that's what matters. Instincts and love are very different. You don't have to be ashamed.”

Her words put me at ease.

Yeah, yeah she's right. I did look at them like that. No, it's more proper to say I looked at them liked that as well. I am both a father and a man.

”And then, about your deepest desire of wanting to be recognized by somebody, you may try to hide it but your actions betray your wish for approval. To speak in plain terms, you are lonely and long for the affection of others. And yet, after all that, you are ashamed to admit to yourself and to others that you feel that way.”

That's not it, I am not a child that feels like that.

…no, I have to stop this stubbornness. Those feelings do exist within me. I have always wanted to be seen, to be recognized.