34 Giving it a name (1/2)

A strong hand grabbed my shoulder and forcefully brought me out from the soft embrace I was crying in. I looked up only to see a tall man's worried look going over my body. I should have rejected the contact but for some reason, my body had willingly fallen into his arms. As my blurry view became clearer, and I felt the entwining musk and cigarettes scent, I realized why I felt safe.

”Are you ok? What happened? Are you hurt anywhere?” the tone of his voice betrayed his panic but confirmed my guess. It was Gray.

I wanted to answer but before I could say anything, his two strong arms locked me in an embrace leaving me feeling breathless. I was finally able to feel comforted to every inch of my body and soul. My desperation slowly slipping away, I tugged at his clothes trying to become closer to him. To feel his body heat, and smell his unique scent. The fact that he was here felt like my salvation but at the same time, my heart hurt at the memories of what happened just before…

It was just a couple of hours ago that I was arriving back home from a job interview for a copywriter position when I noticed a familiar figure exiting from my apartment building, which made me freeze in my tracks. I really hoped I was mistaken, but I had a feeling that I was not.

I tried to catch up to her but she disappeared in a blink of an eye. With a heavy heart, I entered my apartment.

I noticed the broom standing by the door while clinking noise could be heard from the kitchen as I approached.

”I'm home. ”

”Welcome back dear, how did the interview go?” My grandmother's tone seemed a bit distraught so I figured that my hunch was right and something must have happened.

”Fine, I guess. Are you okay? Did something happen?”

”I'm fine, fine, just some scammer was trying to cheat me.” My heart froze once again.

”A scammer? What did they want?”

”This girl just came over and started telling an inconceivable story like how she knew you and how she was worried about you becoming a mistress and other such nonsense.”

”A mistress?” I shuddered at the thought. I knew it was her, and at that moment I hated her with all my heart. But at the same time, I realized that her plot did have a grain of truth, or even a bucket, depending on who you ask.

”She even tried to show me a blurry picture saying how it was proof. I swear these scammers are becoming more and more shameful. She must have prepared a lot of things just to sway me.”

”Yeah sure, they prepared...” I started to agonize over the truth once again. It's already been a month since we last saw each other and now there are less than 5 months left until the deadline. I knew I would have to tell the truth to my grandmother sooner or later but I still hesitated. She always was old fashioned regarding our way of life, even if she didn't want to admit it. She wouldn't easily approve of mine and Gray's relationship without a fight, and at her advanced age that would be quite a shocking piece of news. Maybe this was a sign that I should talk to her about it but I didn't have the courage to, not yet at least.

”Are you okay? Why are you just standing there? Did you perhaps really know that girl?” My grandma has always been quite observant and this time as well she must have noticed the grey expression on my face. I turned my eyes towards her and I could feel her probing me for the truth. I started becoming even more undecided whether to tell her or not.

”I didn't see her so I don't know who you are talking about. It's probably just a nutcase trying to make some money by sprouting off fantasies about me and my boss.” I trying to calm myself and pretend that there was nothing wrong, and it is all a farce.

”I never said anything about your boss… How did you know?” My grandmother's suspicious tone send me in a panic. I started recalling the conversation, it's true that she never said anything about Gray. My flustered face must have been a dead giveaway along with my inability to reply. The whole house was silent and the only noise disturbing it, was that of the running water over the dirty dishes.

My grandmother finally broke the silence and asked with a stern voice:

”Katelyn Ross, you look me in the eye and tell me that there is nothing you have hidden from me.”

I could not do it. I was forced to tell her. I was tired of hiding things from her and I shouldn't. She would feel even worse if she knew that I lied to her face.

”I do have some personal secrets, as do we all. But I can say that I have never done anything against my conscience.”

”And do these personal secrets involve your former boss? Better said your married former boss?” My heart was beating harder at these questions. I was not totally guilt-free, but it was something unavoidable for me as it was for him.

”Yes, they do involve him. But grandma, it's not how it seems...” I tried to explain in a way that will not make it seem worse than it is, but her response cut away my retreating path.