Chapter 4: Fate – translated by Spence (1/2)

“Listen up, guys!” Wolf-dàgē’s tone was serious as he addressed us before the start of our first round in the finals. “We will need to work harder than ever now that we’re in the finals. The opponents that we are going to face will definitely be worthy foes. We must not take them lightly.”

All of us nodded earnestly.

“Lolidragon, do you know who we’re fighting next?” I asked. Lolidragon nodded, and I took another bite of bread before pressing her for details about the enemy.

Lolidragon wrinkled her brow and said, “They’re called ‘Ascendant Dragons’. I haven’t heard any special rumors about them, but their team’s combat strength seems to be pretty average. They only managed to get into the finals because they haven’t met any strong opponents thus far, so they should be pretty easy to handle.”

I let out a sigh of relief. “That’s great, then. It seems like our first match will be a cinch.”

I stepped into the arena, looking the epitome of cool as usual, but… Although it was normal to be nervous during the first match of the finals, my legs felt like jelly. My eyes were listless, my mind was completely blank, and my lips drew into a tight line as I stared dumbly at the opposing team.

At the center of that team, a very conspicuous couple was engaged in an extremely cloying and disgusting public display of affection…but that wasn’t the reason for my sudden loss of composure. The reason I was so shocked was because…

They were my parents – the same parents who had left my brother and me to fend for ourselves for months at a time as they went on their Nth honeymoon!

My god, Dad and Mom! You guys went on a honeymoon – how did you guys end up in Second Life?! How am I supposed to fight? If I beat up my parents, will I be considered an unfilial daughter? Worse yet, if I’m found out, MY ALLOWANCE WILL BE HISTORY.

“Prince, what’s the matter? Is something wrong?” Lolidragon asked, looking slightly concerned.

“Uh…everything’s fine!” I answered, willing myself to calm down. It won’t happen! Even my own twin brother – who sticks to me from dawn to dusk – doesn’t realize that I’m his sister, the lovely Feng Lan. If that’s the case, there’s no way that my parents – who go on honeymoons two hundred days a year – would recognize me! My allowance won’t be reduced for beating up my parents…

“Hubby, don’t you think that hottie over there looks a bit familiar?” remarked Ascendant Dragons’ mage, the lovey-dovey wife. The more she looked at him, the more she felt like she had seen Prince before…

The lovey-dovey husband looked fondly at his wife and, upon hearing her words, reluctantly raised his head to look. He replied, “Eh! He does look a tad familiar. Could he be one of our neighbors?”

“No idea!”

I rolled my eyes. Dad, Mom, can’t you talk more softly? Even my teammates can hear you! Helplessly, I met the probing eyes of my teammates and shrugged innocently.

“Battle, begin!” the referee mercilessly shouted.

Ah, it started, it started! What do I do? My thoughts were in disarray as I looked at my teammates and then at my parents, my mind a battlefield of conflicting emotions.

“Honey, the fight’s started. Let’s finish this quickly so we can get on the plane and head home.”

“Oh…but if we go home, it won’t be just the two of us anymore! Plus, you’ll have to cook and do the chores, and you won’t be able to spend time with me. It’ll be so bothersome!” the lovey-dovey wife said, her face clearly revealing her desire not to return home.

“Haha, don’t worry! I’ve trained Feng Lan well! We’ll tell her to do the chores and cook. That way, I’ll be able to spend all my time with you, okay?” replied the lovely-dovey husband. Hahaha, he thought. As the saying goes, ‘Care for a daughter a thousand days, and she will take care of you for the rest of your life’!1

Mom! Dad! I’ve changed my mind! A vein popped on my forehead as I clenched my fists till my knuckles cracked. Even if it means that I will lose every cent of my allowance for the rest of my life, I will beat both of you to a pulp! “Prince…?” The members of Odd Squad looked at me in astonishment, as my entire body seemed to blaze with an unseen fury.

“I. Will. Obliterate. Them!” The words were ground out from between clenched teeth.

In the real world…

Briiiiing! Briiiiing!

I stretched my hand out to turn off the noisily ringing alarm, and removed my game helmet.

Pinched by guilt, I wondered, Was I too brutal to my parents? Hmph! Forget it, they were the ones who betrayed me first, so they can’t blame me for getting back at them. Besides, all I did was punch my dad about a few hundred times. And I was really merciful to my mother; I killed her in one hit!

I stretched, crawled out of bed, and went to prepare breakfast. Today’s the first day of school; it’ll be bad if I’m late. I decided to quickly wash up, and then do battle with the mess of eggs, toast, and coffee.

Striding out of the kitchen with the aromatic plate of breakfast, I saw my brother lazily sprawled out on the dining table.

“What’s for breakfast, sis?”

“One specially cultivated energy-boosting egg, high class French toast, and a cup of thick and creamy Turkish coffee.”

“Oh… So it’s an egg sandwich with a cup of coffee!” my stupid brother said, before boorishly grabbing the plate and beginning to wolf it down. Waaah! That’s the breakfast that I poured my heart and soul into making! Can’t you eat it in a more gentlemanly manner?

I suddenly remembered something. “By the way, we’ll need to buy groceries after breakfast. Mom and Dad are coming back.”

“Eh? How do you know?” my brother asked, giving me a suspicious look.

My heart nearly stopped. “Uhhh…they called.”

“Really…? Since when did they learn to call and check up on their children?” Disbelief was clearly written all over my brother’s face.

“Just eat your toast, all right? If you keep pestering me, I’ll see to it that you don’t get dinner tonight,” I bellowed, pushing my guilty conscience aside.

“Okay, okay! …You’re always threatening me with food,” whined Yang Ming.

“What can I say? Food’s the only thing that works on you,” I said with a shrug. In this respect, we are clearly siblings.

Food is not our only common ground. Let me make it clear here that this unfortunate bond between my stupid brother and I goes a LONG way back. In both elementary and middle school, we were in the same class. We went to the same high school (although we were in different classes, as the school separated boys and girls), and now, we have the same classes in university. There’s only one way to explain this situation: fate.

I seriously suspect, however, that the REAL reason we have the same classes in university is because my lazy brother secretly copied my career planning form as he was too lazy to even fill out his own! (Not that he’s admitting to it!) In any case, we now attend the same university and even have the same classes. (Just as a side note, the university is very close to home, so we live at home and go to school via public transport.)

“Hurry up, sis! The bus is about to leave!” Yang Ming roared furiously.

“Okay, okay!” I yelled as I began sprinting madly, swearing silently, Stupid Yang Ming! You think my agility and the length of my legs in real life are the same as they are in ‘Second Life’?

Out of breath and panting hard, my brother and I entered the classroom a minute after the bell rang, where I discovered that the teacher was already at the podium! I hurriedly bowed and apologized to the teacher. “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t worry, just quickly find a seat and sit down.”

The teacher’s deep, gentle voice soothed me, but somehow it felt weird…

Why is this voice so incredibly familiar? An alarm sounded in my brain, and with some reluctance, I slowly raised my head to look at the teacher.

Wow…what a handsome face… GUI! I stared at him, slack-jawed and bug-eyed, and thought, Am I still playing?

“Sis? If you want to stare at hot guys, at least do it after you get to your seat.” My brother’s infuriating voice rang out in the classroom, and my classmates erupted in laughter.

I could only stagger to my usual seat in a stupor. My two best friends sat next to me: Gu Yun Fei (he’s male, but he’s a gossip queen so Jing and I treat him as a female) on my left and Lü Jing (she’s a cute girl) on my right.

“Who’s he?” I asked Yun and Jing, pointing at the familiar face at the podium.

“Seems like he’s a new professor,” Jing replied as she stared at the “new professor”, clearly mesmerized.

“He’s too young to be one!” I looked at “Gui” in disbelief. He can’t possibly even be thirty years old. He’s definitely not a day over twenty-five, at most twenty-six! He’s only a few years older than the students, but he’s already a professor?

“I heard that he’s a genius with an IQ of 200, that he entered university at the age of fifteen, graduated at eighteen, received a doctorate at twenty-two before furthering his studies overseas, and returned with another doctorate at twenty-five. And, at twenty-six years old, top universities in the country were all vying to employ him as a professor,” Yun said, envious.

…Then he might not be Gui after all! Whether or not Gui actually has anything inside that head of his is something I’ve been deeply suspicious about to this day. Still…he looks too much like Gui. He looks exactly as Gui does in Second Life, without any beautification whatsoever.

Professor “Looks-Like-Gui” smiled and said, “Good morning, students. I am your new Professor for History of Chinese Literature, Min Gui Wen; you can just call me Gui. I’m actually not that much older than you, so I hope we can get along like friends.”

I collapsed onto my desk. If I said he isn’t Gui, who would actually believe me? Gui is my professor? My god, I DON’T BELIEVE IT!

“Jing, can you help me ask him – Professor Min – if he plays Second Life?” I asked, having gathered up my courage. I decided to ascertain once and for all whether my luck really was that rotten.

Jing regarded me with suspicion. “Why don’t you ask him yourself?”

“Uhhh, I… I’m shy!” I replied with a weak laugh.

“…” Jing and Yun looked at me incredulously and my face burned with embarrassment.

“I have no idea what you’re trying to pull… Fine, whatever, I’ll help you ask! I’m interested, since I play Second Life as well,” Yun muttered. He then raised his hand and asked, “Professor Min, may I ask you something unrelated to class?”

Professor Min replied with an easygoing smile, “You may.”

“Do you play Second Life?”

Professor Min paused for a moment, surprised, and then replied enthusiastically, “Of course! I’m taking part in the Adventurers’ Tournament. My team has already cleared the first round of the finals!”

Four out of every five students present gave a surprised exclamation, such as “Really?”, “That’s incredible!”, or “What team are you in?”

As the atmosphere in class livened up, Professor Min also dropped his professor-like demeanor and answered all the questions happily. “I’m a bard of the demon race. I’m a member of Odd Squad.”

“Odd Squad? That’s a very famous and weird team. I heard that their main fighter, the warrior Prince, is extremely strong and incredibly handsome!” Yun exclaimed.

Professor Min… Gui enthused, “Yeah! Prince is really very strong, and he’s also extremely handsome.”

“Are you serious? Even more handsome than you, Professor?” Jing asked, astonished.

“He’s much better looking than me,” Gui replied, his expression serious.

“Oh my god, Lan, did you hear that? Aren’t you playing Second Life? Have you ever seen Prince?” Jing suddenly grabbed me by the shoulders and began shaking me, causing me to snap out of my zombie-like trance.

“I guess… you could say so!” I replied weakly, all my strength drained away now that the truth had been confirmed.

“Ohhh…so you must have seen Professor Min in Second Life! That’s why you wanted us to ask him, right, Lan?” Yun said, his bright voice attracting Gui’s attention.

Oh my god, Gui is looking at me! I avoided his glance and casually raised a hand to cover my face even as I mumbled, “Nah. I went to watch the Adventurers’ Tournament, so I saw him from afar, that’s all.”

Out of the blue, a disgruntled voice rang out in the classroom.

“Prince? Hmph!” Feng Yang Ming’s scorn was clearly written all over his face.

“Do you have something against Prince?” Gui asked. His expression had become frosty, and the atmosphere in the class cooled rapidly as well.

Yang Ming’s head was tilted to one side, his posture a clear display of arrogance as he replied, “I just had a run-in with him before, that’s all.”

I regarded the tense atmosphere between my brother and Gui nervously, but for some reason, Gui seemed to have frozen. The look in his eyes was too complicated for me to figure out. The chilly atmosphere lasted for a while before…

“Stand up,” Gui said in a stern voice.

Everyone in the class emitted an apprehensive gasp. I, too, glanced anxiously at my brother, deeply worried that he would offend the professor on the first day of classes. Yang Ming’s expression stiffened, and then he slowly got to his feet. Although he was doing as he was told, the look in his eyes said that he had no intention of backing down.

Gui seemed shaken at first. Then, as though he could hardly believe his eyes, he spoke at long last. “Prince…?”

Yang Ming looked at the professor uncomprehendingly.

“…” My eyes widened. What is this scene that I’m seeing?

Gui seemed to have realized that he was behaving oddly in front of his class, because he immediately calmed down and smiled. “You may sit down now! Let’s do a roll call so that I can get to know everyone.”

I sat there uneasily with a heap of unanswered questions until the dismissal bell finally rang. As soon as Gui walked out the classroom, I immediately collapsed onto my table. I thought, Just how exactly am I going to get through this semester? And Gui exclaimed “Prince” when he was looking at my brother earlier on – what on earth could that mean? Could Gui have mistaken my brother for me? That’s impossible…

CRAP! I thought, having suddenly remembered that Gui was GAY! …If he mistook my brother for me, then… Oh god! My blood seemed to freeze within my veins.

“Lan, Lan! Professor Min said that if we play Second Life, he’ll take us to meet the members of Odd Squad. I sooo wanna meet Prince!” Jing said with a longing face, “So I’ve decided to play, can you help me level?”

“…” *SWEAT*

“Lan, tell me your username. I’ll PM you once I’m online and we can power-level Jing together! After that, we can all go and meet Prince. I want to ask him how he managed to become that strong,” said Yun, his expression similarly anticipatory.

“I…” What should I do…? I want to cry…

“What’s the matter? Or could it be that your level’s too low and you’re too embarrassed to tell us?” Yun asked, laughing.

“Err, yeah, that’s it! I didn’t train much, so I can’t help power-level Jing. You can take care of her,” I said hastily.

Puzzled, Jing said, “So what? We’ll just ask Yun to power-level the two of us in that case!”

I cast about for an excuse, any excuse. “I…uh, my hubby will power-level me!”

“Ohhh – so you just don’t want anyone barging into your private world, huh! You traitor, ditching your friends for a guy,” said Jing and Yun, poking fun at me.

“I…” Waaah… I really want to cry now…

In the school clinic…

Gui stepped into the school clinic. Leaning against a wall, he watched the tall, broad-shouldered doctor inside, who was busy putting away the medical equipment. After a long while, he finally said, “I met a student today who really resembles Prince.”

The doctor’s back seemed to freeze for a moment. Then he turned around. “What a coincidence! Prince is also here?”

“I’m not certain if it’s actually him. In terms of their looks, they’re not that alike, but their posture and attitude are almost identical,” Gui said, his brow creased with thought.

“Try asking him?”

“I wanted to ask at first, but he didn’t seem to recognize me. I don’t know if he’s just pretending not to know or if he really just isn’t Prince.” Gui raised his head and looked at the doctor. “Wolf-dàgē, should I ask him or not?”

“About that…hmmm!” Wolf-dàgē’s – Li Tian Lang’s – rough-hewn and open face was filled with hesitation. “Your appearance is exactly the same in real life as it is in-game, so if he really is Prince, he must have just been pretending not to know you, since he could probably recognize you… Why don’t you just ask him tonight, when you’re online?”

“Hmm, all right,” Gui replied, deep in thought.

At this time, I had just dragged my exhausted self home, where I saw my dad and mom fuming in the living room.

“Dad, Mom, you’re back,” I greeted them cautiously.

“XIAO LAAAAAN!” my mom suddenly hugged me tightly and began sobbing incoherently.

Shocked, I didn’t know what to do, so I turned hurriedly to my dad and asked, “Dad, what on earth happened?”

“It’s all because of that Prince…” my dad said indignantly through gritted teeth. “It took us so much effort to get into the finals, only to be defeated in the first round by him. Damn him!”

“…” It’s about my male alter-ego again, I thought, breaking out in cold sweat.

“That damn Prince, I hate him,” said my mom as she looked up, her face contorted with hatred.

“Who said that they hated Prince?” Yang Ming asked as he came through the door. “I hate that punk too – he stole my chicks and caused me to get punished on the first day of school by my professor. I’ll kill him, even if it costs me my life!”

“That’s right! We will kill him, even if it costs us our lives!” echoed my parents.

“…” *Cries* I finally understand how you felt besieged by enemies on all fronts, Xiang Yu!2

Online…

I met Lolidragon the moment I logged on to Second Life that night.

“Prince, you look rather pale,” said Lolidragon. She looked at me worriedly as I alternated between sitting down and pacing about uneasily.

“Is Gui here yet?” I asked, not really answering her question. Instead, I kept glancing left and right, unable to calm my heart down.

“Not yet… Since when did you care about him that much?” Lolidragon asked, looking at me with uncertainty.

“Quit having fun at my expense, Lolidragon! You have to save me!” I wailed as I hurtled into her arms.

Lolidragon clearly received a fright from my action. She quickly asked me what on earth had happened, so I tearfully recounted today’s tragic encounters. First, I told her about my meeting with Gui, and then about how he actually mistook my little brother for me. After that, I told her about my brother’s resentment towards me, and finally, about how even my parents vowed to kill me or die trying…

My god, this has to be my unluckiest day ever.

“Hmmm…” He really is pitiable. It’s such a big world, yet Prince simply had to run into Gui – this must be fate!

After three seconds of silently commiserating over Prince’s misfortune, Lolidragon began to feel that the whole incident was…very interesting!

Unfortunately, with my head buried in her arms, I did not notice that Lolidragon – who delighted in chaos – was grinning evilly, her fox’s tail showing…

“You don’t need to be so worried, Prince. You don’t even need to rush to deny it; I suspect that Gui might not believe you anyway. It’s only a matter of time before we meet Feng Wu Qing, and when that happens, Gui will realize that he’s made a mistake,” said Lolidragon.

In her head, she was thinking, Still, before we meet Feng Wu Qing… Heh heh, there’ll be a good show to watch! Lolidragon’s grin grew even more cunning…

“Really?” I asked, my brows furrowing.

Lolidragon began to nod frantically.

“Then…okay, I guess!” I said. I’m still a bit hesitant, but… Sigh! What will happen shall happen. What can I do about it, anyway?

Lolidragon suddenly pointed behind me and said, “Gui’s here.”

I froze. As I turned slowly, Gui’s familiar face with its playful, cheerful smile came into view.

I forced my tense facial muscles to relax and smiled awkwardly. “Morning, Gui.”

“Good morning, your Highness is as beautiful and noble as always on this morning.” Gui gave a sweeping bow as per usual.

“Yeah… Ahahaha…” I laughed weakly.