Vol 1 Chapter 1.2 (1/2)
Chapter 1: Xiao Xue Part 2—Yu Shu—translated by Raylight
Immediately after the butler left, the woman sat down. She seemed to have no inhibitions at all as she stretched out both legs on the sofa, acting as though there was no one in front of her. Then, she gave a self-introduction. “I am Yu Shu, a novelist.”
“Yu Shu? I haven’t heard that name before.”
“…The door is behind you, on your left.”
Jiang Ziya immediately corrected himself, “Yes, yes! I seem to have caught a glimpse of your books in the book store before. You wrote that, that… Harry Potter!”
Yu Shu bitterly growled, “That was written by J.K. Rowling! If I had written such a book, do you think that I would still be living across from your apartment? At the very least, I would be living in Dibao1—Okay, enough about me. Name yourself! Having to say ‘you, you, you’ constantly is really inconvenient!”
Jiang Ziya nodded his head, and then the words came out of his mouth. “My name is Jiang Ziya.”
“…The door is behind you, on your left.”
Seeing Yu Shu look at him as though she was looking at a madman, Jiang Ziya felt entirely speechless.
What was most detestable was that even he himself would admit that if someone introduced themselves as Sun Wukong,2 he would also tell the other person to turn around and exit through the door on the left. The name Jiang Ziya was not any better.
In a situation like this, the simplest and most clear-cut method of solving this would be—presenting his identification card.
Yu Shu took the ID card and looked. The name printed on it truly was “Jiang Ziya.”
She scratched her face and returned his ID card, saying, “So your name really is Jiang Ziya… The world is full of extraordinary things. Sorry about that!”
Jiang Ziya nodded his head expressionlessly, and then pocketed his ID card.
“So… Grand Duke Jiang, what brings you to my home?”
“What an outdated gag!” Jiang Ziya immediately growled, “I just knew that you were going to call me that! Ever since I was a kid, people have always been calling me Grand Duke Jiang! Hmph. Aren’t you an author? How can you actually be this uncreative and even dare use such an old joke!”
“I am the queen of old gags! So what?” Yu Shu didn’t seem to mind in the slightest as she said, “I even opened a nursing home for elderly gags! I can’t do that? Grand Duke Jiaaaaang, if you have the guts, bite me!”
Jiang Ziya gritted his teeth in hatred, feeling his teeth itch in response. But he couldn’t possibly get up and actually bite her! Especially since this person even had a butler that he was still uncertain as to whether it was a human, a ghost, or a doll!
However, the way Yu Shu kept laughing nonstop really p.i.s.sed him off…
“Making fun of other people’s names is not right! Didn’t your parents teach you that? Don’t think that just because you have a normal name, you can discriminate against those with uncommon names!”
“I’m not discriminating against other people. I’m only discriminating against you!”
“You…”
At this point, the butler came out with the drinks.
He smiled gently at Jiang Ziya, saying, “There is no cola in the apartment, so I have made milk tea with black tea and milk instead, then added ice cubes to it. Would that be to your liking?”
Hearing the butler’s words, Jiang Ziya was a little touched. He quickly took the milk tea and gave his thanks. Once he drank a mouthful of the milk tea, his eyes immediately doubled in size. Thick, fragrant, and rich… This milk tea was so good it rendered him speechless! Who knew how many times better it was than the ones from drink stalls outside?!
He couldn’t resist finis.h.i.+ng it in one go.
“Would you like another one?” The butler asked with a gentle smile on his face.
Jiang Ziya nodded his head vigorously.
As the butler poured him more milk tea, Jiang Ziya secretly observed him.
Although this butler’s true ident.i.ty was that of a doll, he didn’t look frightening at all. He was so handsome that there wasn’t anything to criticize, and he was extremely gentle. He always had a smile on his face, and most importantly, he brewed really good milk tea!
“Why do you keep staring at my butler?” Yu Shu coldly said, “Even if you have fallen in love with him, I won’t hand him over to you. Dream on!”
Jiang Ziya promptly turned around and roared, “Like h.e.l.l I fell in love with him! If he were female, I might have considered it!”
“You don’t think he’s scary anymore?” Yu Shu drank her coffee, and said in a relaxed tone, “You seem to be able to accept stuff pretty easily.”
Jiang Ziya grumbled, “I have seen a whole lot of strange things since I was young. I wouldn’t have been able to cope if I wasn’t this flexible, right?”
Yu Shu nodded, saying, “This is called adapting.”
“We don’t have time to be drinking milk tea!” Jiang Ziya had finished the milk tea he held once again, and then had abruptly remembered that he had not come here to drink tea. He jumped up and roared, “My family’s Jiang Jiang…”
“Jiang Jiang isn’t part of your family.”
“Nonsense!” Jiang Ziya immediately yelled, “I still remember what she looked like when she was born. How is it possible that she isn’t part of my family! Don’t speak such nonsense. Hurry up and return her to me!”
Faced with the enraged Jiang Ziya, Yu Shu continued to look nonchalant and even stretched. She then asked, “If so, do you remember what you were doing when you received the news that your sister was about to give birth?”
Jiang Ziya froze, and while trying hard to remember what he had been doing at the time, realized that he could not actually remember.
Jiang Jiang is three years old. If it was three years ago, he would have still been in high school. However, he didn’t seem to have any recollection that he had ever left cla.s.s halfway or run straight to the hospital after cla.s.s. Could it have been a holiday? Then he would have followed them to the hospital, but he didn’t remember doing that either…
“People’s memories are really amazing. Normally, one isn’t able to remember the details of most incidents, so instead one would naturally replace them with a ‘plausible scenario.’ Then, they act as though that is what had actually happened.
“People’s memories are as unreliable as they can get!”
Yu Shu gave a cold laugh and said, “You should remember something like your sister lying on the hospital bed, and then the nurse carrying over a wrinkled new-born child. After that, you cautiously took her from the nurse’s arms and cradled her… Some scene like that, right? Is there any difference between that and a scene from a television drama about a new-born child?”
After hearing her describe it, there really doesn’t seem to be any difference. Jiang Ziya frowned. But the memory did not feel like it was a fake. He had obviously really experienced it!
Yu Shu lazily said, “It seems that although your eyes can see the truth, your brain is still very ordinary.”
What is that supposed to mean!? Jiang Ziya unhappily asked, “Are you saying that I’m stupid?”
“No, an ordinary brain is the brain of an ordinary person. Don’t randomly misinterpret what I mean!” After Yu Shu scolded him, she continued explaining, “Because you have the truth-seeing eye, but only an ordinary brain, you did not suspect Jiang Jiang, who had already become real. However, Xiao Xue, whose form is still that of a doll, could not deceive your eyes.”
“Become real?” Jiang Ziya asked, blanking out.
“Calling their name once would wish them into illusion, calling them twice would change them into lies, and calling their name thrice would make them come true.”
Jiang Ziya turned around to look at the butler. The latter still had a faint smile on his face. However, what the butler had just recited made him feel thoroughly confused. He didn’t comprehend its supposed meaning.
The butler smiled at him, saying, “I am an ‘illusion’ who has had my name called once by my mistress. Please pay attention to me for a moment.”
Hearing that, Jiang Ziya instantly stared at him with wide eyes.
The butler performed a very strange motion and gradually “drifted” to one side. In his original position, there appeared a male doll around seventy centimeters tall. Its appearance and clothes were almost exactly the same as the butler’s. When the butler stood beside the doll, the two didn’t look any different at all… Other than the fact that there was nothing below his thighs.
Jiang Ziya’s eyes grew even wider than before.
The butler explained patiently, “I am currently residing in that doll. For a short period of time, I can make myself look like a human. Only then can I help my mistress take out the trash.”
“So… you are a ghost?” Jiang Ziya relaxed a bit—no wait! A ghost isn’t any better than a doll!
“Of course not!” Yu Shu said unhappily, “Simply put, he is someone that I imagined and created. Do you understand now? Your family’s Jiang Jiang must also be the product of someone’s imagination!”
How can something imagined possibly appear in real life… Jiang Ziya felt like his brain had been scrambled up, and could only ask, “Then what about Xiao Xue?”
Yu Shu seemed deep in thought as she said, “Xiao Xue’s situation is a little weirder. Do you remember anything involving dolls?”
Jiang Ziya unhappily replied, “How would I know… Wait!”
He stopped, abruptly remembering that his sister Jiang Yu had a doll. It was… a past birthday present that their father had bought for her!
That doll looked like… a little girl with white hair and blue eyes!
Jiang Ziya screamed. “So Xiao Xue is really a ghost doll?”
“That’s not it!” Yu Shu roared angrily, “I already told you this has nothing to do with ghosts! My butler is not some ghost that appeared after some guy died! Forget it. I’m too lazy to explain it to you. Your brain is really too ordinary and is much worse than your eyes.”