Part 84 (1/2)

Troubled Soul, I burden you with my pros only to belabor this point: that you not diminish the act you are considering, which, because it so violently impacts your life, and more so than anyone else now capable of opinion-because of this, you, and you alone, must decide your embryo's fate, and then live, and perhaps suffer, with the choice you've made.-I hope that I've been helpful.

Sincerely,

A Concernced Citizen

The second note was as follows: To Occupant: I observed your letter as it was printed in the Promenade, and was so impressed by your correspondence that I was moved to send you this note, which has taken me forever to compose.

I am a husband and a parent, and love dearly my wife and daughter; but yesterday (a few days before your receiving this), I cheated-at least, I think I did; for never did my genitals touch another's, which means, in the literal sense, there was no s.e.x; and if there was no s.e.x, then, I believe, as does my favorite President, I did nothing wrong, for what is mere petting but harmless play? Indeed, I go to sleep at night free from guilt because I know-as you do, I'm sure-that nothing I did can be interpreted as cheating. Still, I would very much like your opinion on the matter.

Thank you,

Friend of the President

Which inspired this response: Dear Friend: Being that I, like you, am a man, and therefore know well your desires, I can truly empathize with your position; for we are sadly, loathsome creatures driven towards monsters more loathsome than ourselves. Be that as it may, what you are suggesting is ridiculous, and for this reason: A man sticks his tongue in your wife's ear-how do you feel? He then puts his pinkie on each of her b.u.t.t-cheeks (which she allows free from guilt, for what is mere petting but harmless play?)-again, how do you feel? And then, simply because it thrills him to do so, he places a toe between her b.r.e.a.s.t.s-once more, how do you feel? . . . My point is simply this: Intimate contact of any kind, with someone-anyone!-beyond your significant other is cheating, and wherever the placement of genitalia; I'm sure your anger, given life by my merely proposing such debauches, is proof enough that I speak true. Admit to this now, and, maybe, possibly, I'll remove my toe from between your wife's t.i.ts.

Sincerely,

A Concerned Citizen

The third correspondence went this way: To a wise and knowledgeable fellow: Please answer this (for your doing so, quickly and promptly, will at once alleviate a tremendous load which threatens, daily, my bones and extremities): What's the deal with the Fed?*4 and moreover, its chairman, Alan Greenspan? I ask this because over the past year Fortune has blessed me, and I have, aided by her keen advice, acquired lots of things-money, car, clothes, women-and enjoy each immensely; however, I am quite fearful of the Joker at the bank, whose tinkering promises to deprive me of all these.-What say you?

Impatient for your reply,

A Restless Neighbor

Which was answered thusly: To Restless Neighbor: Being that I am a simple man, I am uncertain how to respond to your note; of its parts, the first is too vague, but the second, however, is a matter I myself have contemplated often, and can best answer thusly: A man in his car is on a road headed for ”Prosperity”; every mile takes him closer to where he wants to be, and each mile seems (and is) smoother than the one before it, making his ride a joyous one; but for fear of an accident which has yet to occur, caused by an oil-spill he has yet to see, the man slows then stops his motion, allowing the car no progress beyond its pa.s.sing through time (which cannot be altered by deceleration). So afraid is he of the ”might” and the ”maybe” that the traveler doesn't dare go further, even reversing the car so to move away from impending doom, which, of course, he has only imagined. Eventually, over time, when he determines it safe to continue, the car, for whatever reason, stalls, though ultimately progresses, but only after much coaxing from its driver. Still, when it does go the vehicle moves much slower than before, and its handling isn't nearly as steady: the road has changed, as has the car, for on this journey time is the only constant; and so the driver, for lack of speed, finds ”Prosperity” to be much farther away.

On Alan Greenspan I say to you this: When traveling, no matter the distance or destination, one should, one must, have courage-and Greenspan lacks this.

Having written thusly, I trust my anecdote was readily understood; for you are, it seems, a very shrewd man; one does not ama.s.s the sums you have on simple good fortune. Still, beyond your query, there is a more relevant question before us, one which, upon my asking, should help alleviate your fear concerning Greenspan's actions: Why does having ”things” matter to you?-and what are you without them? I ask the latter because: when a man is himself nothing, he requires additions to make him whole, i.e., money, car, clothes, women-anything that might bring to him greater visibility-by this I mean, relevance. Ponder this, answer this, and learn from that result; for only then will you have something which, it appears, Fortune has yet to grant you . . . peace.

Sincerely,

A Concerned Citizen

The fourth: Kind Sir- My boyfriend and I argue incessantly, and always about the same thing: My clothes. Being that I am young, beautiful, and shapely-and will be none of these forever-I feel it is both my right and duty to display to the world my magnificence; for is not beauty meant to be shared, adored, and admired?-Am I not doing, by wearing clothes that reveal to lesser eyes my glory-I say, am I not doing only what is right?

Without shame,

Venus

Which inspired this: Dear Venus- I agree: Beauty is a thing that should be shared and admired; nevertheless, you got to have cla.s.s with that a.s.s.

The fifth: To whomever is capable of answering this: My dilemma is a desperate one; for it deals with the heart, a broken heart, and one belonging to me.

Three years ago I broke up with my dearest love, a woman whom I cherished more than anything or anyone, in this world or the one beyond it. Nevertheless, despite my affection, I, using faithful logic, one day determined that this woman-this angel!-though fulfilling all my emotional and s.e.xual needs, was my lesser intellectually, and could never placate that part of me which requires more than simple hugs and kisses. Still, as I have said, it has been three years since my leaving, and my soul screams for her, as it did when we were lovers. Because of this I cannot sustain a relations.h.i.+p beyond a few months, so long is the shadow she casts, so black is my heart, which dies form lack of sun, its peddles . . . wilting. and so I have chosen to remain alone (for circ.u.mstance will not permit our reuniting). I hate being this way, but what am I to do? I ask you: Will I ever love again?

With reverence,

Anteros

And to this he responded: Anteros: Know this: The question is not will you ever love again? but will you ever stop loving? For it is only when you no longer love this girl will you be free to love another.

Sincerely,

A Concerned Citizen