Vol 1 Chapter 4 (1/1)

Chapter FourNo o to the office the next dayWith neither illness nor disaster, I had no excuse for not goingIn regards to the repercussions of no sleep overnight, it can be solved with two big cups of coffee and a tabletAs usual, I can still work to earn money and live wellOnly my pale co through the whole night, I really can’t be like when I was young and act as if nothing had happenedBut I wouldn’t let myself appear down and outIt was nothingdealKe Luo was nothing to me, only a bed companionI didn’t feel wounded myselfAt this age, I should have long been immune to “infatuation”On a usual day of work, I actually didn’t feel sleepyAt noon, I had intended to lie down for a while on the couch, but I couldn’t sleepThe faint smell of leather azed at the office ceilingIn a distorted position, I san to throb with pain again for a period of ti protestAt night, I had to take so this ti if there were still leftovers in the drawersThe phone suddenly rangThe cigar, which I was holding unsteadily, almost fellI looked at it as it rang for a good while, not answeringI thought about it and then turned off the soundIf I didn’t, I’d feelAfter the other side hung up, I was still holding the cell phone with my eyes fixed on the screenTen e notification popped up“I’m sorry”Ke Luo was apologizing to meBut apart from such words, he had no other words to say to , I had been waiting for just this one lineI sat up, leaned on the couch, and chose a posture to continue sarI didn’t knohether I should replyI had always been a clear-cut decisive person, yet now I hesitatedIf I forgive hireat extentBut if I co too much about him?A real bed coHe would chuckle, curse a feords, and then continue to have sex, seeking pleasureWe loved each other’s bodies anywayOnly people who have had their hearts wounded would take troubles to heart, as if the heart was pierced by a thorn, incapable of reliefAnd I didn’t acknowledge itI wasn’t hurtI was simply irritated that’s allI never did care for Ke LuoHow could such a little brat, whose heart is filled with thoughts of someone else, stir my heart?I just liked his young bodyOther than that, he has nothingEach day forward, Ke Luo didn’t call overAnd I was Hamlet for a number of daysThere, for the sake of the question, “to reply or not to reply,” I turned it over again and againI s to end, I never did press that buttonAdvancing and retreating was surprisingly so difficultDragged through it for more than a week, suddenly there was no news from Ke LuoEvery day, I stared at the cell phone in front of meWith not much to do, I felt empty all at onceI sarettes while I cursed the ht, actually why bother?I was old enough to be his fatherWhy do I have to get upset over such a young kid?When I was his age, it was unlikely that I was that entI had done a lot of foolish thingsPutting myself in his shoes, there wasn’t really any reason for ainst Ke LuoI should have a bit of tolerance I didn’thi fun anyway; sleeping around to kill timeI racefulThen I went out to find Ke LuoIt had only been teeks since I’d been to Ke Luo’s apartment, but I was rather timid as I stood outside the doorI didn’t knohere the nervousness cahed twice to clear my throat and fixed my hairWith a natural and unaffected attitude, I liftedthe doorbellYet, the door never opened before my eyesThe person inside seemed indifferentAs I was in disbelief, I heard footsteps behindoverShe was fishi+ng out her key froreeted me with a smileShe was the landlord who lived just across froiven Ke Luo pies and puddings she had made herself“Excuse one out?”She seemed surprised, “You don’t know?Jack has already moved out”I was momentarily somewhat confoundedAfter a short pause, I asked:“Do you knohere he moved to?”“He was an exchange studentHe was supposed to stay until the end of the se to his countryThis time, it seems like he went back before he notified his course withdrawal”“Oh…”I pausedI wanted to ask a few more questions, but I was at a loss for words“Thank you”I ran hthe car, I sarettesSuch a big thing and that kid didn’t say a word to e to tell me is fineI knew he felt that it wasn’t necessaryBesides owingelse is of my concernAll the betterIt’s simpler this wayWith the cigarette in my mouth, I cautiously drove on the roadThe night as strong, alaretteI drove this kind of sports car exasperatingly sloithout the slightest bit of the casual indifference I had come withIn its place, I was like a foolish idiotThis city’s night scene is, without a doubt, gorgeous but very boringI couldn’t find a place to goI circled around several tiarettesThen I drove on htclubThe club was lively as usualOn stage was the Go Go Boy ShowThe at the rooftop with the screa reat and to miss it would be pityS blond boys with captivating eyesTheir hands were ready for bills, but inactionsKe Luo’s nearly transparent skin, his dark eyes, fine black hair, the curve of the corner of his , the kind of passion with focused devotion that deeply penetrated inHe can really act as a spoiled child, but can be sooodbye to meI held out my hand and placed it on my fairly hot foreheadKe Luo’s phone number was finally deleted from my cell phoneIt was already a disconnected numberThose unreal sweet days I had once gone through had thus co for only the moment it took to blinkYet it seeetful, so I didn’t have any so-called lingering feelingsFor the few months after Ke Luo had left, my luck appeared to plummet all the way to the lowest pointForget about nota comeback in affairs of the heart, I also lost repeatedly at casinosI had run off to Las Vegas to gamble a few roundsAnd each tile winI was so furious at losing the roulettesIn front of the slot machines, I pulled the lever for half the dayNot even once had I actually heard the clanking of coinsTo be able to decline like hoas now hadn’t been easyIt was only for fun anywayWealth, this kind of stuff, if scattered, will come backI didn’t careI played to my heart’s content for several days, took all the valuables on asI lost to the extent that I’d nearly shed edto pick ly, the coGreaterfor meIt was at a crucial point that I was fooledI had gas to support the politician who fell from powerIn addition, several scandals broke out, snatching any hope of cli back upThe path I had painstakingly paved was goneAt this moment, I finally caence and skill I had, my true colors would be revealed as no nificant roleAcard in someone’s hand that, when shoas the first to be shown and, in death, was the first to dieThis time, I lost so much that I couldn’t compensate for the lossThese days becahtAt such times, I had absolutely no need for sleep, because I simply couldn’t sleepI usually had quite a few opponents and evenThe so-called friends by my side seemed to have, one by one, disappeared from the face of the earthI realized at such a ti hail to snoas frequent and that there was no coal being sent during the snowI couldn’t wagactionI could only put on a bold face and request for help from the few people who couldAt such a tinityNot knowing if God finally no longer wanted to sever me off, day after day as I was in torment, I received a call back at lastOnce I heard the voice on the other end, I was so grateful that I was almost in tears“Lu Feng?”This was exactly like a strand of life-saving straw that had floated by in the vast, boundless oceanThe hed, “I’ve heard that you’ve seemed to have run into trouble”I also folloith a laughAlthough I had already suffered until I couldn’t anyuy wasn’t a philanthropistHe was a businessman“If there’s any inconvenience, I’ll help you take care of itBut I happen to need an assistant who I can trustDo you want to consider co back?”At that tiled in LA, I had been a subordinate for Lu FengI practically watched his career grow fro whaleLater, I grew out raduallypeople in court, and then my connection with him naturally fadedI now threwover againSeveral years of hard work had all gone up in s to face this fact, I was somewhat in despairBut now, the me who had been stuck in theoodEloo away s in LA“Thank you”That evening, I began to set out, packing sIn fact, what I planned to take wasn’ta tripI just picked what are important to takeAs I ruh the drawers, I found a photo froIt was taken by Ke LuoAt that ti love, we’d kiss on and offThe brat suddenly fussed that he wanted to take picturesI couldn’t dissuade him, so there was still such a PolaroidIn the photo, Ke Luo shtlyThe oldto look the ca very sillySo fell asleep before I recalled h, I cru and threw it to the sideAfter a while, I retrieved it backI unfolded it and craLet it be I didn’t need to make a fuss over itIt’s all in the past anywayI would keep it as a et too quickly what he looked likeOnce I returned to China, so someone to help me settle in with easeBut he seeI rested for several consecutive days until I was summoned by his householdI went to the company to meet himLu Feng was a considerably tall man, forty years oldUsually atoward fifty, should have so because of excessive pressure, and bad habits here and thereHowever, upon seeing hiureJust like ten or so years ago, he looked handsome and stern, calant pride, didn’t change one bitI think it’s probably because he’s too coldbloodedHe, hie rooer than the average person“I’m tired”Upon , with an eht in ht he was going to say “I’m tiredYou all bury yourselves with me”This was his style“I’d like to hand over these affairs to soht and took a sip of his tea thoughtfully“I do have a candidateMy friend’s son is very capable, but he’s still a child and needs souide him”I gave an “Oh”Lu Feng would help someone raise a kid…I can sitimate sonAs for hoas born, that’s a mystery“Then, do you think I can raise him better than you?”He placed his cup down and laughed, “Of course not, but I don’t have the time”I i furtherToin the world that he can’t cope, and that’s hi the man he has liked for decadesI had met the man--tall, yet thin, a refined scholar appearance, a body that see could put him to death with one s to himThat et difficult with so ruthless, forcing hi it beyond redemptionnobody spoke againTwotea; each preoccupied with their own thoughts“I’ve really done wrong”Hearing hiloom and looked up at himIn fact, eren’t talking about business, we could be regarded as friendsI understood him and occasionally listened to him subtly say what’s on his mindEven if he was such a proud man, he needed to pour his heart out as well“Can’t you make up for it?”He shook his head, “Do you think there is anything that can make up for it?What’s done is doneWhat’s dead is deadWhat amends?It’s all bullshi+tI just want to wait until Xiao Chen no longer blames me”He chuckled, “Forget itI know he’s always hated meLee, I now believe there is retribution”I listened to hih that face still had no expressionI truly had to ad an emotionless faceThe low pressure in the room was unable to provide reliefI reached toward the box on the table and took out a cigar, “Want a smoke?”Lu Feng sipped his tea again, “I’ve quitIf you want to so outside”“Quit?”I caughta lion eat turnips“I can’t expose Xiao Chen to second-hand smokeI still want to live a few entle expression,er”I wanted to heartlessly mock hi around and my words softened: “He’s simply the apple of your eye”He actually accused ly mushy”“What?”Being falsely accused, I almost jumped up, “Look in the ly mushy is!”After teasing each other for a while, we calhtly smiledHe pressed his hand to his chest and said in a low voice:“He’s my heart”I knew that he was just talking to hi it for me to hearI still couldn’t help but soften my heart at his expressionI didn’t want to compliment hi Yi Chen, no ive their hearts to him, they would only be trampled on like mudBut I was soonist of each other’s life, not everyone has that opportunitySome people…will play second fiddle to fate for lifeI sat back down and drank ht knock on the doorThe afternoonwas about to start, and it was time for me to meet the person I would take care of as a full-time nanny in the future“Come in”The door carefully openedSeveral people cas, “Mr Lu”Only one voice was distinct: “Uncle Lu”The speaker was very young and particularly handsomeAs a fresh, youthful face in the crowd, he appeared eye-catching with an exceptionally beautiful brightnessI had only seen him wear a sports jacket, but for so a suitI had been worried that et what he looked like, but now I realized that was not so“Everyone, be seated”Lu Feng noddedOnce he sat up straight, that feeling of intihtestwith fearThe young boy didn’t seem to feel the pressure as he quietly sat with a natural expressionHe is Lu Feng’s son after all“Lee, let me introduce you”I took a sip of the tea and sedThis hat one calls lurking out fro oneself“This is Ke Luo”I stared at the large-eyed boy and s to do with each other any since I’d seen himNo matter what the an to thump for some reason“Xiao Luo isn’t very smart, but he’s very sensibleLee, you should teach him some”Someone who becomes a father, noabout his own outstanding son, his voice would soften a little, “Xiao Luo, come hereThis is my underclassman back in the days and also your seniorHurry and address Uncle Lee”I sly with an expression exactly like his old erI hadn’t even noticed it beforeKe Luo had never asked for e, and I certainly wouldn’t let hiuely told him I wasn’t yet thirty and he was actually convincedBeing exposed was so eIf I lacked just a bit of willpower, I believe I’d blushThe endless conversation passedKe Luo was sitting diagonally opposite of meI wanted to look at hi at me, so I kept an unnatural posture with radually felt my waist sore and my back acheFortunately, Lu Feng’s men didn’t talk nonsense; each and every one, short, and to the pointBefore long the regularwaved his pardon and took care of us: “We’ll stop here, Xiao LuoAccompany your Uncle Lee outSend him home”I can finally openly look at Ke LuoI saw hile-hearted devotionHe didn’t raise his head until he heard as saidHe then said, “mm-hmm”Ha, the face that had always liked to stare at me was in a dazeThe little brat ould stare for ten or so minutes had already disappearedI packed s and walked out with him at a relaxed paceThere were twoplanned for Ke Luo to replace the driver, elder Yang, to pick and drop me off, I’d rather the new car never arrive at allI got in the car and Ke Luo still didn’t say a wordHe was quiet for a while until he turned to look at ht you’d be Uncle Lu’s friend”I spread esture, took out a cigarette, “I was just kidding before about the eYou didn’t take it seriously now”He was very serious, “That’s okayI’ve also deceived you”I heavily sarette, and looked up at him“While in Los Angeles, I shouldn’t have treated you like thatIn fact, the one I like is another person”I said, “Oh,” and s“But he already has a loverI pester hi them, so he told me I should properly find someone to loveSince I didn’t want to worry him, I went to try”“Oh”I put out the old cigaretteI bowed down again, lighting a new one, as I held it in my mouthSo when they’re honest than as liars“But I realized that I still couldn’t do itI understood once I saw hiainI can only like him”I sarette in my mouthI really wanted to lecture this little brat, who didn't know the i a knife to oodBut that serious expression on his face makes people unable to do itI didn’t want my own face to display a furious expressionWe had broken up anywayWhy should I lose my old face and my rice bowl?“It’s too early to say thatYou’re still so young”I quickly sarette and used a senior’s tone, “The road ahead is still longMaybe soht person”He ihtest hesitation, “I can’t forget himHe’s the person I love the most in my life”I laughed and stubbed out the cigaretteI couldn’t help but reach out to touchme a headache“With your affair, I truly am very sorry”He lifted his eyes, “If you don’t want to see o explain it clearly to Uncle Lu”I sed, “No needJust forget about the yEveryone is just playing anywayWhy take it as real?”If I really let Lu Feng know I had fooled around with his son in bed, I can just find a rope to tie around my neckI still wanted to liveFurtherainI turned my head a little bit to see his faceHe was probably thinking of that man Shu Nian whom he loved so much, therefore his eyebrows creased with his lips faintly poutingThis kind of look contained a very child-like innocence that I liked so very, very much in the pastBut now I just felt slightly tiredOnce I settled down, I decided to seek a new object for pleasureThis was nothing strangeIf I didn’t even have that sort of need, then that would’ve been shockingThis was the benefit of being singleEncountering an object with an eye-pleasing figure, and a sizzling one-night stand will come aroundNo need to look ahead and backThe other person’s background, interests, te as I have an erectionI intended to live for a ti as I pleaseI was different from Ke LuoKe Luo was stubbornHis uy called Shu Nian who could look round or flat for all I knowEvery day he’d persistently make a phone callOnce he had the time, he’d send a textAnd occasionally, he’d receive a response as if a precious jewel had fallen into his handsI merely s trapped in the snare of love and unable to free himselfI felt a bit bored