Part 12 (2/2)
Harris said, ”Maybe you'd better...”
”Yeah.”
Harris walked him away from the table. He turned to him at the door.
”Let me have your card,” the detective said. ”I may want to call you.”
Ed's bladder suddenly wanted to empty.
”Why?”
”There are still a lot of unanswered questions about Kelly Wade. Maybe you can answer a few.”
”Sure,” Ed said, fighting the urge to run.
He fumbled out a card and shoved it into the detective's hand, hoping he wouldn't notice how his hand trembled.
Harris glanced at it then slipped it into his pocket.
”Great. We'll be in touch.”
And then Ed was out in the hall, slowly fleeing for the street, wondering how he would explain to his office why the NYPD was calling him. He cursed himself every step of the way.
s.h.i.+t-s.h.i.+t-s.h.i.+t! You're in deep s.h.i.+t, Ed! And you deserve to be in deep s.h.i.+t. Because you're an a.s.shole, Ed! Only a primo five-star flaming a.s.shole could get himself into a mess like this!
”You can go, too,” Kara told Rob as he closed the door behind Ed.
He turned and stared at her. She was still standing by the table, looking as if she was going to come apart. He couldn't leave her like this.
”Can I finish my drink first?”
”Sure.”
He slipped into his chair again and took a small sip. He'd have to nurse this one. Finally, Kara slumped back into her own chair. She ignored her drink and stared at the wall.
”What's wrong, Kara?”
”Nothing.”
”Want to talk about it?”
”No.”
He rattled the ice in his gla.s.s. ”You didn't ask me over here just to tell me that Kelly had a multiple personality. You could have told me that on the phone. If you want to talk, I'll listen. If you need a friend, I'm here.”
Kara continued to stare at the wall, but Rob noticed tears gathering in her eyes. She spoke without looking at him, and her voice was so full of pain that he felt his own throat begin to constrict.
”He says our father molested us as children.”
Rob was numb for a moment. He'd never met Kara's father. He died before she came to New York.
”Good Lord, is that... is that true?”
”No!” she said through her teeth. ”Never!”
”Then what's the problem?”
Kara went through her conversation with Dr. Gates almost word by word. Rob listened with growing alarm, piecing together the picture, sensing what was coming and not wanting to hear it.
Finally, toward the end, Kara seemed to run out of steam. To spare her further torture, Rob finished it for her.
”So you're afraid you might have a second personality, too, this 'Janine,' hiding inside of you.”
Kara shrugged. ”Yes and no. I know Ingrid was lying about my father, I just know it! But do do I know it? I don't know what I really know anymore! Am I talking complete nonsense or does any of that make sense to you?” I know it? I don't know what I really know anymore! Am I talking complete nonsense or does any of that make sense to you?”
Rob reached out and put his hands over hers. She didn't pull it away.
”It makes sense. I just don't know how to help you. I wish I did.”
She got up and walked past him. A few steps and she was in the living room. Rob turned in his chair to watch her as she sat on the sofa with her hands clamped between her knees.
”I've got to know, Rob. I can't go through the rest of my life not knowing. I'm a mother. For Jill's sake, if not my own. I've got to know if I'm okay inside. I mean, am I all one piece or is there a time bomb named 'Janine' ticking away in my head? I've got to know!” know!”
She looked so miserable, so tortured. Rob went over and sat next to her.
”What about hypnotism? Didn't Gates say that's how he found this Ingrid inside of Kelly?”
She nodded. ”Yes, but...”
Rob waited.
”Rob, I'm so scared!” she said.
Instinctively, he slipped his arms around Kara and pulled her against him. She buried her face against his shoulder. Her voice was m.u.f.fled.
”I've got to know, but I want it to come out all right. I mean, what if Ingrid was telling the truth? G.o.d, what if there is is a Janine inside of me?” a Janine inside of me?”
”Don't you think you'd know?”
”Kelly never knew until Gates discovered her other side. What'll I do?”
Rob thought about that. He tried to put himself in her place. What would be best for her?
”I look at it this way,” he said slowly. ”If you take a chance and it turns out something's there, it'll be painful, painful as all h.e.l.l, but at least you'll know where you stand and you can start dealing with it. The way it is now, you're nowhere. And you'll remain nowhere until you have some facts to steer by.”
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