Chapter 66: Visiting the Cemetery (1/2)

Translator: Claire.KK

Zhishu He asked the doctor to take him to the cemetery, Anxian Cemetery in Hangzhou, where his parents were buried. This had always been the pain that hid in the depth of his heart, the pain he didn't want to bring up.

The sky was drizzling. The wind blew tiny raindrops on the windows of the car that parked outside the cemetery.

”Shall I wait for you outside?” Ziyu Ai passed Zhishu He his coat and got off the car to grab an umbrella in the trunk.

Zhishu He didn't move; he lowered his head, hands covering his face, body quivering. He dared not to visit his parents. Nor did he think he was entitled.

He wanted to visit the old house but he didn't in the end. That house was sold to someone else a long time ago and it was refurbished, leaving no trace of the old owners at all. Zhishu He was the one sold the house after his parents died, then he used the money to cover the down payment for their house in Beijing.

Zhishu He figured that he and Wenxu Jiang might be the same type of person that said sorry just for show while making amends by telling themselves how guilty they were. The type of person that was selfish and always hurt the ones that loved them.

Ziyu Ai opened the door and held the umbrella for Zhishu. ”I'll go in there with you.” Zhishu He was carrying more burdens than anyone could imagine, the doctor felt unsettled to leave him to deal with all the pain by himself so that he couldn't sleep at nights.

Zhishu He slowly raised his head; his eyes looked timid and somehow evasive. I'll... go?” He was asking the doctor, but it was more like he was trying to find himself an excuse to not go.

Ziyu Ai tended to resign himself to Zhishu and he would always say something like ‘we can do it next time when you feel better’, but this time, he said nothing. He wanted Zhishu to untie the knot in his heart in the last days of his life.

‘There's something that you need to face up to.’

”Put on your coat, I'll walk you in there.” Ziyu said in a gentle tone.

Zhishu heavily rubbed his temples and eventually got off the car. Standing at the entrance of the cemetery, he saw the layers and layers of gravestones lining up on the vast grassland in distance; suddenly, he stumbled.

Ziyu hurried to steady him with one hand while holding the umbrella with another. ”Are you okay?”

Zhishu shook his head. ”Let's get in.”

His parents' grave wasn't easy to locate so Zhishu He searched for the right one based on his vague memory. One grave after another, the sadness and hopelessness became heavier and heavier.

The large black umbrella Ziyu was holding moved back and forth in rain quietly and solemnly.

At last, Zhishu stood still before a marble gravestone as if he had an electric shock. His face started to pale; his lips were shivering. It took him a while to recover, then he slowly turned around to push the doctor away and barely made a sound. ”Give me some space,” He asked, ”Could you?”

”Sure,” Ziyu Ai totally understood it, ”Here, take the umbrella.”